I've been doing some more research on this whole area of media and the relationship to self. There is not much work being done, except for a bit on post-traumatic stress and war journalists.
I thought this quote summed up why I think this is an important area of study.
"Good journalism depends on healthy journalists. For the general public to be kept abreast of important world events, it is essential that the news not be filtered through the emotional distress of the men and women recording history."
Reporting Under Fire: Understanding Psychopathology of War Journalists
By Omar Ghaffar, M.D., M.Sc., and Anthony Feinstein, M.D., Ph.D., M.Phil.
For those of you wanting to go further into this, the article can be found here.
Also interesting findings -- which is pretty consistent with what I've seen -- we're drinkers but not heavily into hard drugs. Bit of pot. Bit of cocaine. Lots of scotch.
It's an interesting read, especially for those in this biz.
Monday, December 19, 2005
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Merry Almost Christmas
I can hardly believe it. It looks like we're going to be having a white Christmas in Windsor. This hardly ever happens -- if Christmas isn't brown down here, it's a slush Christmas.
But no. It's cold. It's snowy. And it's lovely.
My Christmas season is pretty relaxing so far, and I like it that way. I'm working at a modest pace, putting together radio shows and getting ready for the radio broadcasting course I'm teaching at the University in January. This is probably the most exciting development -- I really do like teaching and I really do love teaching radio in particular, so it's a good thing to do.
More than several people have said "so, are you going to do your doctorate?" Well, I'd have to do a Masters' first, but it's an idea I'm kicking around. There are a few areas of research I'm interested in. One of the main things that intrigues me is the role of the self in contemporary media. The dominant idea that I am developing (informally thus far) is that we are not allowed to even HAVE a self. This is rooted in the dogma of objectivity. And because we are encouraged to remove the self from our work, our work also becomes divorced from all the other selves we are writing about, and are writing too. And that's one of the reasons why we have such weak programming on the air.
Okay, I'll save the rest for my thesis.
I'm training myself to go easy on myself and not to need to accomplish everything I want to in two hours. I'm in a comfortable place right now and really happy I have everything I need for the next little while -- good friends, a good place to live, enough to live on, interesting work and a mind and body that works really well.
I am happy. I don't have a clear map of the road ahead, but I am finally learning how to live with the mystery.
Love
Victoria
But no. It's cold. It's snowy. And it's lovely.
My Christmas season is pretty relaxing so far, and I like it that way. I'm working at a modest pace, putting together radio shows and getting ready for the radio broadcasting course I'm teaching at the University in January. This is probably the most exciting development -- I really do like teaching and I really do love teaching radio in particular, so it's a good thing to do.
More than several people have said "so, are you going to do your doctorate?" Well, I'd have to do a Masters' first, but it's an idea I'm kicking around. There are a few areas of research I'm interested in. One of the main things that intrigues me is the role of the self in contemporary media. The dominant idea that I am developing (informally thus far) is that we are not allowed to even HAVE a self. This is rooted in the dogma of objectivity. And because we are encouraged to remove the self from our work, our work also becomes divorced from all the other selves we are writing about, and are writing too. And that's one of the reasons why we have such weak programming on the air.
Okay, I'll save the rest for my thesis.
I'm training myself to go easy on myself and not to need to accomplish everything I want to in two hours. I'm in a comfortable place right now and really happy I have everything I need for the next little while -- good friends, a good place to live, enough to live on, interesting work and a mind and body that works really well.
I am happy. I don't have a clear map of the road ahead, but I am finally learning how to live with the mystery.
Love
Victoria
Saturday, December 03, 2005
Quick Update
Well, things are moving ahead really nicely down here. My art installation "Mixing Addictions" is going together really well and I actually have the self-discipline now to work on it in both a systemic and spontaneous way (this is one of my biggest challenges).
AND ...
I have been offered a sessional instructor job teaching radio broadcasting at the University of Windsor. I am still pretty amazed .. I've done some teaching before but not at the university level. This is a very good thing. Maybe I'll even start to think about doing a master's ... not sure where all this is going but it's a good direction.
More later. Got to get to the studio.
AND ...
I have been offered a sessional instructor job teaching radio broadcasting at the University of Windsor. I am still pretty amazed .. I've done some teaching before but not at the university level. This is a very good thing. Maybe I'll even start to think about doing a master's ... not sure where all this is going but it's a good direction.
More later. Got to get to the studio.
Monday, November 28, 2005
A Hopeful Perspective
This was emailed to me by the amazing Grace Lee Boggs, a long time activist in Detroit. It gives me a lot of confidence and hope to read that there are other people too who think that the dark times we are living in are just the opening act for the light to come.
The winter solstice is coming .. time to look forward to the return of the light.
V
ANOTHER WORLD IS NECESSARY
ANOTHER WORLD IS POSSIBLE
ANOTHER WORLD HAS ALREADY STARTED
Michigan Citizen, Nov. 27-Dec. 3, 2005
We are in the midst of a great transformation, not only economically but
psychologically, culturally, politically, in our relations with one
another, to the Earth, to other species and to other peoples of the world, and
in our concept of ourselves and of our rights and responsibilities as human
beings.
To an unprecedented degree, as we approach 2006, millions of us are
aware that our present and impending disasters are not natural but man-made,
the consequence of our limitless pursuit of capital accumulation.
Up to now the main victims of this have been the peoples of the global
South. But now the chickens are coming home to roost. In our own countries,
the United States and throughout Europe, there are tens of millions who
for decades have been marginalized, living how they can, without any social
safety nets, unemployed, disempowered, disenfranchised, disengaged,
disrespected, and without a perspective of another positive future.
These people in the so-called informal sector are now being joined by
those who through centuries of struggle and sacrifices thought they could look
forward to a stable and secure future for themselves and their children.
At this moment and under these circumstances it would be easy to
despair. But this universal crisis is not only a danger but a promise, an
opportunity to advance ourselves and our societies to a new level, based
on a new vision, new principles and values:
* Respect for the limits of the earth
* Responsibility for community and notjust for self
* Concern for posterity into theseventh generation
* Partnership instead of patriarchalrelations
* A new concept of Work based on usevalues and skills
* Resistance to commodification of human relationships and of all life
* Local, sustainable and self-relianteconomies instead of one global
dominant economy
* Diversity instead of monocultures
* Restore the joy of living incommunity with all creatures
* Practice global citizenship topreserve the best of our historical
traditions
* Social justice and cooperation instead of exploitation and
competition
WHAT DO WE DO NOW? HOW DO WE GET FROM HERE TO THERE?
WE can begin by restoring our relationships to each other and to the
Earth
WE can create gardens, for food, health and to create a community as a
basis for resistance, for learning and enjoyment of young and old.
WE can create new subsistence skills to grapple with our present
problems and the challenges to come.
WE can transform our schools from job-and-career-oriented institutions
to places where children and young people can learn the values of teamwork,
serving the community, self-reliance and the joys of creativity
WE can initiate discussions in our communities locally, nationally and
internationally on new visions, a new perspective, and the profound
historical meaning of the great turning during this time in which we
live.
WE can share and spread the word of what people are already doing to
create a better world.
Grace Lee Boggs, Detroit, Michigan., Boggscenter.org
Maria Mies, Koeln, Germany, Women and Life on Earth (WLOE)
Shea Howell, Detroit, Michigan
Werner Ruhoff, Koeln, Germany
Hilmar Kunath, Hamburg, Germany
Elisabeth Voss, Berlin, Germany
Irina Vellay, Dortmund, Germany
This statement emerged from some o f the participants in the
International Workshop on Self-Organizing and Common Self-Reliance, Cologne, Germany,
October 20-22, 2005.
The winter solstice is coming .. time to look forward to the return of the light.
V
ANOTHER WORLD IS NECESSARY
ANOTHER WORLD IS POSSIBLE
ANOTHER WORLD HAS ALREADY STARTED
Michigan Citizen, Nov. 27-Dec. 3, 2005
We are in the midst of a great transformation, not only economically but
psychologically, culturally, politically, in our relations with one
another, to the Earth, to other species and to other peoples of the world, and
in our concept of ourselves and of our rights and responsibilities as human
beings.
To an unprecedented degree, as we approach 2006, millions of us are
aware that our present and impending disasters are not natural but man-made,
the consequence of our limitless pursuit of capital accumulation.
Up to now the main victims of this have been the peoples of the global
South. But now the chickens are coming home to roost. In our own countries,
the United States and throughout Europe, there are tens of millions who
for decades have been marginalized, living how they can, without any social
safety nets, unemployed, disempowered, disenfranchised, disengaged,
disrespected, and without a perspective of another positive future.
These people in the so-called informal sector are now being joined by
those who through centuries of struggle and sacrifices thought they could look
forward to a stable and secure future for themselves and their children.
At this moment and under these circumstances it would be easy to
despair. But this universal crisis is not only a danger but a promise, an
opportunity to advance ourselves and our societies to a new level, based
on a new vision, new principles and values:
* Respect for the limits of the earth
* Responsibility for community and notjust for self
* Concern for posterity into theseventh generation
* Partnership instead of patriarchalrelations
* A new concept of Work based on usevalues and skills
* Resistance to commodification of human relationships and of all life
* Local, sustainable and self-relianteconomies instead of one global
dominant economy
* Diversity instead of monocultures
* Restore the joy of living incommunity with all creatures
* Practice global citizenship topreserve the best of our historical
traditions
* Social justice and cooperation instead of exploitation and
competition
WHAT DO WE DO NOW? HOW DO WE GET FROM HERE TO THERE?
WE can begin by restoring our relationships to each other and to the
Earth
WE can create gardens, for food, health and to create a community as a
basis for resistance, for learning and enjoyment of young and old.
WE can create new subsistence skills to grapple with our present
problems and the challenges to come.
WE can transform our schools from job-and-career-oriented institutions
to places where children and young people can learn the values of teamwork,
serving the community, self-reliance and the joys of creativity
WE can initiate discussions in our communities locally, nationally and
internationally on new visions, a new perspective, and the profound
historical meaning of the great turning during this time in which we
live.
WE can share and spread the word of what people are already doing to
create a better world.
Grace Lee Boggs, Detroit, Michigan., Boggscenter.org
Maria Mies, Koeln, Germany, Women and Life on Earth (WLOE)
Shea Howell, Detroit, Michigan
Werner Ruhoff, Koeln, Germany
Hilmar Kunath, Hamburg, Germany
Elisabeth Voss, Berlin, Germany
Irina Vellay, Dortmund, Germany
This statement emerged from some o f the participants in the
International Workshop on Self-Organizing and Common Self-Reliance, Cologne, Germany,
October 20-22, 2005.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
You're actually reading this thing ..
I stopped updating for a while because I was getting the impression that nobody was reading this. But I've heard from a few of you who say it's a helpful way to see what part of the planet I am on. So I'm going to keep going with this. At the very least, it's another way to journal even if y'all aren't reading.
But I think you are.
Well, the house is sold and gone. And I actually have a bit of money. For the next month or so I am just going to hang out, do art, settle in to my new place and not put any expectations on myself. Come January I'll start looking for a job. Don't think that will be too hard -- the kind of job I am looking for is the kind that doesn't take up too much space in my brain (literary credits to my friend Sarah A. for coming up with that very descriptive way of describing what I am looking for.) Maybe I'll go get a job at Best Buy for a while and just enjoy hanging around with all that gear (and take advantage of staff discounts, of course). And I've got my used bookstore gig. And there's always the old standby -- modelling for art classes (kinda cold in January but I'll just buy myself a fuzzy robe for the breaks). And I have two music students. All these little bits and pieces add up, especially since I have considerably reduced my cost of living.
I have also applied to be a sessional instructor for the Radio Broadcasting course at the University -- that WOULD take up a lot of space in my brain but I am up for it.
I'm liking being back in Windsor. The "there's no place like home" sentiments have slightly worn off but it's still good. I've been back long enough to see that Windsor hasn't changed a whole lot in 25 years. In some ways, it's a really progressive place. In other ways, it's a black hole.
The things that are good:
a) the river -- it's the only place I've lived where the boats are actually close enough to see more than an outline. And the riverfront became a lot prettier in the days after I left. Great sculpture garden too.
b) there's a lot of progressive politics here
c) wonderful friends, especially my friend Mary who has provided me with a wonderful place to overwinter.
d) a good university (DESPITE what Macleans magazine says)
e) a very cute little apartment. I am enjoying "small" -- I loved my big house but I am finding this place much more manageable. And easier to decorate -- in my house, things had to be very large and dramatic to be noticed. Here, the smallest things don't get lost.
The things that are not so good:
a) the pollution. Steel plant just across the river. Gee, just like Hamilton.
b) gawd, is this city ever American
c) there is a really underdeveloped understanding of the role of arts and culture at the civic level (true everywhere, but it's especially bad down here). This filters down to the level of the ordinary folks, causing things like no money for art, the sense that artists are society's equivalent of the flea on a dog's back. The up side, though, is that there is a resilience and a frontier mentality among the people who are just going ahead and doing art anyway. And that creates a vitality and energy that is different than that which exists in places where we are validated a bit more.
Overall, there are more good reasons to be here than not. At least for a while.
I still want to go east. The winds are not blowing in that direction yet but if I pay attention I will know when it's time.
For now, I have a sound art installation I have to get working on. I will post details here tomorrow. Or maybe later today.
Get in touch! My email is getting really boring.
But I think you are.
Well, the house is sold and gone. And I actually have a bit of money. For the next month or so I am just going to hang out, do art, settle in to my new place and not put any expectations on myself. Come January I'll start looking for a job. Don't think that will be too hard -- the kind of job I am looking for is the kind that doesn't take up too much space in my brain (literary credits to my friend Sarah A. for coming up with that very descriptive way of describing what I am looking for.) Maybe I'll go get a job at Best Buy for a while and just enjoy hanging around with all that gear (and take advantage of staff discounts, of course). And I've got my used bookstore gig. And there's always the old standby -- modelling for art classes (kinda cold in January but I'll just buy myself a fuzzy robe for the breaks). And I have two music students. All these little bits and pieces add up, especially since I have considerably reduced my cost of living.
I have also applied to be a sessional instructor for the Radio Broadcasting course at the University -- that WOULD take up a lot of space in my brain but I am up for it.
I'm liking being back in Windsor. The "there's no place like home" sentiments have slightly worn off but it's still good. I've been back long enough to see that Windsor hasn't changed a whole lot in 25 years. In some ways, it's a really progressive place. In other ways, it's a black hole.
The things that are good:
a) the river -- it's the only place I've lived where the boats are actually close enough to see more than an outline. And the riverfront became a lot prettier in the days after I left. Great sculpture garden too.
b) there's a lot of progressive politics here
c) wonderful friends, especially my friend Mary who has provided me with a wonderful place to overwinter.
d) a good university (DESPITE what Macleans magazine says)
e) a very cute little apartment. I am enjoying "small" -- I loved my big house but I am finding this place much more manageable. And easier to decorate -- in my house, things had to be very large and dramatic to be noticed. Here, the smallest things don't get lost.
The things that are not so good:
a) the pollution. Steel plant just across the river. Gee, just like Hamilton.
b) gawd, is this city ever American
c) there is a really underdeveloped understanding of the role of arts and culture at the civic level (true everywhere, but it's especially bad down here). This filters down to the level of the ordinary folks, causing things like no money for art, the sense that artists are society's equivalent of the flea on a dog's back. The up side, though, is that there is a resilience and a frontier mentality among the people who are just going ahead and doing art anyway. And that creates a vitality and energy that is different than that which exists in places where we are validated a bit more.
Overall, there are more good reasons to be here than not. At least for a while.
I still want to go east. The winds are not blowing in that direction yet but if I pay attention I will know when it's time.
For now, I have a sound art installation I have to get working on. I will post details here tomorrow. Or maybe later today.
Get in touch! My email is getting really boring.
Monday, November 21, 2005
What I want for Christmas
Just about says it all, doesn't it? You can get these from the Rabble Podcast Boutique -- only $16.50! Pretty cheap price for a whole bunch of cheeky attitude, if you ask me
and oh ya .. that would be size Medium ...
Sunday, November 20, 2005
ssshh .. don't tell anybody
I'm supposed to be working. It's Sunday afternoon and I'm at my new few-hours-a-week-when-we-need-you musty used bookstore job. It's my first day all by myself here. I'm liking it. Just me and a whole bunch of thinkers who have collectively penned no less than 3 trillion thoughts.
Okay, so maybe I should be working but I think I will allow myself a little break from my very busy day. Besides, there are a lot of ideas in here -- it can get very overwhelming if I'm not careful.
There are a lot of books in here, you bet. And this is probably only .000000000000001111111111111 of all the books published in the world and exist at this point in time. That doesn't count all the countless millions that have been burned down through the ages.
On second thought, make that number .00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
0000000000000011111111111111111111111111111111111111
111111111111111. And that's probably a conservative estimate.
Doing well. Always searching for the right balance between being and doing. Finding it occasionally and trying to go easy on myself when I don't get it right.
More later. Got lots of radio shows coming up and cool things for people to listen to.
Okay, so maybe I should be working but I think I will allow myself a little break from my very busy day. Besides, there are a lot of ideas in here -- it can get very overwhelming if I'm not careful.
There are a lot of books in here, you bet. And this is probably only .000000000000001111111111111 of all the books published in the world and exist at this point in time. That doesn't count all the countless millions that have been burned down through the ages.
On second thought, make that number .00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
0000000000000011111111111111111111111111111111111111
111111111111111. And that's probably a conservative estimate.
Doing well. Always searching for the right balance between being and doing. Finding it occasionally and trying to go easy on myself when I don't get it right.
More later. Got lots of radio shows coming up and cool things for people to listen to.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Settling in to Windsor West
Just thought I'd pop in with a bit of an update for those of you who check this out to see where I am.
I'm settling in nicely into my little basement live/work space on the west side of Windsor. Most of the time it feels energizing to be here. I've got a couple of grants in, plus am preparing a submission for a sound art installation here in Windsor. And my podcast debuts on Tuesday at Rabble.ca -- it's called "The House of Sound and Story" and will focus on the good things artists are doing to build this house we call earth. My first program will be about Penn Kemp's Poems for Peace project and will be a performance and discussion about how words create and destroy peace.
I am also starting a radio show at CJAM on November 23 addressing the same kinds of themes. And I'm playing piano again, thinking about taking a composition course in music come January.
And dog training lessons, likely skating lessons with my 6 year old niece Emily.
Got a couple of loads of stuff to get from Hamilton yet and then I'm done and out of there. It's been a long haul ... the change is very welcome.
More later about my sound installation ... it will be really great to get back into circulation again.
I'm settling in nicely into my little basement live/work space on the west side of Windsor. Most of the time it feels energizing to be here. I've got a couple of grants in, plus am preparing a submission for a sound art installation here in Windsor. And my podcast debuts on Tuesday at Rabble.ca -- it's called "The House of Sound and Story" and will focus on the good things artists are doing to build this house we call earth. My first program will be about Penn Kemp's Poems for Peace project and will be a performance and discussion about how words create and destroy peace.
I am also starting a radio show at CJAM on November 23 addressing the same kinds of themes. And I'm playing piano again, thinking about taking a composition course in music come January.
And dog training lessons, likely skating lessons with my 6 year old niece Emily.
Got a couple of loads of stuff to get from Hamilton yet and then I'm done and out of there. It's been a long haul ... the change is very welcome.
More later about my sound installation ... it will be really great to get back into circulation again.
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Don't play with your food!
Lori and her pal
I love this picture. It's my best buddy and sister Lori. She's in China right now and she's been sending home lots of stories about what she's been eating (pig intestines on shiskabob skewers. Frogs .. whole ones ... chicken baked in mud.)
This is Hairy Lobster .. which is a kind of lobster with seaweed.
I love this picture because I think of the all times (every mealtime) when she says "Emily, don't play with your food).
I think it's hard for her to be a mom sometimes because she hasn't forgotten how to be a kid herself. And that's what makes her a great mom. And a wonderful sister who makes me laugh.
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Making Friends with the Neighbours
Direct Action -- Northern Ontario Style
My cousin Lisa just sent this picture in a batch from her parents' new place near Goulais River (which is near the Soo).
My aunt, M. Catherine Brown, is known for her direct way of making the point (one of my favourite stories is that she wrote to Mother Theresa to tell her she was wrong. AND got a reply, hand-addressed direct from Calcutta).
But geez, Cath, couldn't you have settled in for a bit longer before causin' trouble?
Just kidding. I know she didn't write this because it's not her handwriting.
Monday, October 10, 2005
I have arrived ...
Hey everybody out there. I told you I'd pop back in and let you all
know when I get where I was going.
I'm here. But not the "here" where I thought I was going to be. I
am in Essex. As in Essex ONTARIO.
Not exactly Nova Scotia. It's looking like Nova Scotia is going to
have to wait.
Here's what happened. Our unconditional real estate offer fell
through. So we are still stuck with a house which isn't selling. I
would go into the reasons for this but it might be libelous.
And, at roughly the same time the house deal fell through, my
accommodations for the winter in Bear River also fell through.
So right now, the message I am getting from the universe at large is
to sit for a while, don't do anything drastic. Nova Scotia can still
happen, just not yet. And in the meantime, there are lots of reasons
to be down here.
I'm only in Essex temporarily and will be moving to Windsor in a
couple of weeks (which isn't far -- Essex is only half an hour from
Windsor) Right now I'm taking care of my sister Lori's 6 and 10
year old daughters while she is away working for GM doing training in
China. Mike, her husband, is here and he is quite a capable and good
dad, but it's still a lot easier on everybody that I'm here. And I'm
having a good time with the little girls, which is one of the reasons
I thought being down here was a good idea. It's also a really Big
Deal to them that I'm here .. makes me feel real important. It's a
good opportunity to be part of their lives and Lori's. They really
need a cool aunt on the scene, at least until they get their first
tattoo anyway.
And the other reason is that I still have a reasonably intact
personal and professional network of people down here in Windsor.
And I've already been offered a place to live -- my long time friend
Mary Atkinson has asked if I would like to live with her in her very
large and cool house near the university. I lived with Mary and her
family when I was going to university and again when I went out to BC
25 years ago. The whole Atkinson family has been a big part of my
life for a long time and it's wonderful to be able to spend time with
them again.
It's all falling into place. This Windsor move is only temporary, I
promise myself. It's a good solution in the short term also, because
I am planning to do some major travelling next year -- first to
Findhorn in Scotland, an amazing community just north of Inverness.
And my friend Dave is applying for a grant to do another global
issues radio project which he will probably get. If he does, I will
be going to Asia to do some stories for him -- still doing my
research, but I am thinking I would like to go to the Himalayan
region of India and also to Nepal. Once I'm there, it's really
really cheap to stay for a while. So I might spend a couple of
months there. Not until next fall because I want to avoid monsoon
season. Which gives me some time to settle in here for a bit.
I've got some work happening and some interesting projects that will
keep me happy and productive. I'm going to be putting together a new
workshop schedule over the next little while -- so for all the
people who have asked me to do a workshop for them sometime, this
would be a great time.
I'm starting to get my groove back. Or maybe I shouldn't use the
word "back" because it's not at all the same groove it used to be. I
think it's much better even if it is still a difficult transition. I
still spend too much time belting out choruses of " Your Cheatin'
Heart". Or just being sad -- I keep thinking it's going to get
better but it's been so much harder since I got back from Nova
Scotia. Part of me wishes there was some way to pull this back
together again and forget that we ever did such a silly thing as
split up.
But it's done. except for jointly owing a house with a curse on it
... I minimize what a bad situation this house deal situation is
because I can't do a thing about it. I'm doing all that I can.
Happy thanksgiving, all of you. I thank you for being there for
being there for me, and for being the collection of wonderful people
that you are. It is really gratifying to know that I have a very
large circle of friends out there, all the way from Ottawa to
Kentucky. And Vancouver, and Seattle, and Brandon, and Kelowna, and
San Francisco. And all over the place.
You have held me up, and you keep on doing it. I'm here for you too,
getting stronger and stronger all the time. I can take care of you
too. And I want to.
Love
Victoria
PS -- you can still email me at fenner@magneticspirits.com -- I am
picking up messages every day. Would love to hear from you.
know when I get where I was going.
I'm here. But not the "here" where I thought I was going to be. I
am in Essex. As in Essex ONTARIO.
Not exactly Nova Scotia. It's looking like Nova Scotia is going to
have to wait.
Here's what happened. Our unconditional real estate offer fell
through. So we are still stuck with a house which isn't selling. I
would go into the reasons for this but it might be libelous.
And, at roughly the same time the house deal fell through, my
accommodations for the winter in Bear River also fell through.
So right now, the message I am getting from the universe at large is
to sit for a while, don't do anything drastic. Nova Scotia can still
happen, just not yet. And in the meantime, there are lots of reasons
to be down here.
I'm only in Essex temporarily and will be moving to Windsor in a
couple of weeks (which isn't far -- Essex is only half an hour from
Windsor) Right now I'm taking care of my sister Lori's 6 and 10
year old daughters while she is away working for GM doing training in
China. Mike, her husband, is here and he is quite a capable and good
dad, but it's still a lot easier on everybody that I'm here. And I'm
having a good time with the little girls, which is one of the reasons
I thought being down here was a good idea. It's also a really Big
Deal to them that I'm here .. makes me feel real important. It's a
good opportunity to be part of their lives and Lori's. They really
need a cool aunt on the scene, at least until they get their first
tattoo anyway.
And the other reason is that I still have a reasonably intact
personal and professional network of people down here in Windsor.
And I've already been offered a place to live -- my long time friend
Mary Atkinson has asked if I would like to live with her in her very
large and cool house near the university. I lived with Mary and her
family when I was going to university and again when I went out to BC
25 years ago. The whole Atkinson family has been a big part of my
life for a long time and it's wonderful to be able to spend time with
them again.
It's all falling into place. This Windsor move is only temporary, I
promise myself. It's a good solution in the short term also, because
I am planning to do some major travelling next year -- first to
Findhorn in Scotland, an amazing community just north of Inverness.
And my friend Dave is applying for a grant to do another global
issues radio project which he will probably get. If he does, I will
be going to Asia to do some stories for him -- still doing my
research, but I am thinking I would like to go to the Himalayan
region of India and also to Nepal. Once I'm there, it's really
really cheap to stay for a while. So I might spend a couple of
months there. Not until next fall because I want to avoid monsoon
season. Which gives me some time to settle in here for a bit.
I've got some work happening and some interesting projects that will
keep me happy and productive. I'm going to be putting together a new
workshop schedule over the next little while -- so for all the
people who have asked me to do a workshop for them sometime, this
would be a great time.
I'm starting to get my groove back. Or maybe I shouldn't use the
word "back" because it's not at all the same groove it used to be. I
think it's much better even if it is still a difficult transition. I
still spend too much time belting out choruses of " Your Cheatin'
Heart". Or just being sad -- I keep thinking it's going to get
better but it's been so much harder since I got back from Nova
Scotia. Part of me wishes there was some way to pull this back
together again and forget that we ever did such a silly thing as
split up.
But it's done. except for jointly owing a house with a curse on it
... I minimize what a bad situation this house deal situation is
because I can't do a thing about it. I'm doing all that I can.
Happy thanksgiving, all of you. I thank you for being there for
being there for me, and for being the collection of wonderful people
that you are. It is really gratifying to know that I have a very
large circle of friends out there, all the way from Ottawa to
Kentucky. And Vancouver, and Seattle, and Brandon, and Kelowna, and
San Francisco. And all over the place.
You have held me up, and you keep on doing it. I'm here for you too,
getting stronger and stronger all the time. I can take care of you
too. And I want to.
Love
Victoria
PS -- you can still email me at fenner@magneticspirits.com -- I am
picking up messages every day. Would love to hear from you.
Saturday, October 01, 2005
War and Peace
I've been having a lot of discussions lately about traditional activism and what works and what doesn't work so well anymore.
A lot of this has stemmed from my growing conviction that we cannot work for justice and create a culture of peace in this world unless we are coming from a centre of peace ourselves. I know this from personal experience .. sometimes I feel like the past two years has been about being sent to the mountaintop to be still. Instead of rushing around trying to accomplish things from a place of frantic activity.
I still have many things to learn. The times when I need to be still are the times when I can't get myself to do it. But I guess that's why meditation and prayer are called a "practice" .. because we need lots of it.
I think one of the reasons I never did a lot of work on myself in the past is because it felt narcissistic and self-centred. Now I am starting to realize there is a difference between being self-absorbed and having a strong sense of self. Because without a strong sense of self, how can we effectively do the social change work that we are called to do?
So much activist work is based on anger and fear. One of the best things to happen in a long time is a growing realization by many people that our activism is so much stronger when coming from a solid spiritual core. And not necessarily in the "religious sense".
I found a wonderful web page on the principles of spiritual activism. It's here if you want to read the whole thing.
These are the main points: (Source: Global Renaissance Alliance -- see link above)
1. STILLNESS AS AN ACT OF POWER
The cultivation of a quiet mind is the most effective antidote to chaos.
2. ENVISIONING AS AN ACT OF POWER
In the material realm, power is determined by material wealth; in the spiritual realm, power is determined by spiritual wealth.
3. INTERPERSONAL HEALING AS AN ACT OF POWER
The source of war lies in each of us, as does the source of peace. As we rid our own hearts of the spark of violence, we are fostering peace in the world.
4. DEPTH OF INSIGHT AS AN ACT OF POWER
The most powerful axis of activism today is vertical rather than horizontal. The depth of a conversation is more important than how many people are involved in it.
5. RADICAL GOOD WILL AS AN ACT OF POWER
Recognition and affirmation of the spiritual innocence in all human beings creates a field of possibility for the emergence of miracles.
6. CREATING SACRED SPACE AS AN ACT OF POWER
The simple configuration of people gathered in a circle, sharing prayer and meditation and heartfelt conversation, casts a web of healing power affecting not only the members of the circle but the world at large.
7. SPIRITUALLY CENTERED ACTION AS ACT OF POWER
The New Activist wields power by standing for what could be, as opposed to fighting what is. Making a stand for a new possibility, we attain the power to create it.
Pretty powerful, eh?
And speaking of activism on a slightly different tangent, there's a good chance I could be in the Himalayas in the spring working on a new radio series called "The Green Planet Monitor". For some reason, any of my ideas about staying in one place for a long time just don't seem to be gathering any steam. I think my address for a while is supposed to be No Fixed Address. And hey, why not?
One of my friends remarked that this must be really stressful for me to not have a home. But really, it's not. I've done this many times before and there's something about wandering around that I really like.
Just wish I could get this Hamilton house situation wrapped up so that I can have no ties to place at all. That's the only thing really dragging me down right now .. and also because as long as Barry and I co-own the house, we can't really walk away from each other as we both would like to do right now. But maybe there's a gift in that somewhere too ... think I'd better go sit on the dock and meditate for a while.
A lot of this has stemmed from my growing conviction that we cannot work for justice and create a culture of peace in this world unless we are coming from a centre of peace ourselves. I know this from personal experience .. sometimes I feel like the past two years has been about being sent to the mountaintop to be still. Instead of rushing around trying to accomplish things from a place of frantic activity.
I still have many things to learn. The times when I need to be still are the times when I can't get myself to do it. But I guess that's why meditation and prayer are called a "practice" .. because we need lots of it.
I think one of the reasons I never did a lot of work on myself in the past is because it felt narcissistic and self-centred. Now I am starting to realize there is a difference between being self-absorbed and having a strong sense of self. Because without a strong sense of self, how can we effectively do the social change work that we are called to do?
So much activist work is based on anger and fear. One of the best things to happen in a long time is a growing realization by many people that our activism is so much stronger when coming from a solid spiritual core. And not necessarily in the "religious sense".
I found a wonderful web page on the principles of spiritual activism. It's here if you want to read the whole thing.
These are the main points: (Source: Global Renaissance Alliance -- see link above)
1. STILLNESS AS AN ACT OF POWER
The cultivation of a quiet mind is the most effective antidote to chaos.
2. ENVISIONING AS AN ACT OF POWER
In the material realm, power is determined by material wealth; in the spiritual realm, power is determined by spiritual wealth.
3. INTERPERSONAL HEALING AS AN ACT OF POWER
The source of war lies in each of us, as does the source of peace. As we rid our own hearts of the spark of violence, we are fostering peace in the world.
4. DEPTH OF INSIGHT AS AN ACT OF POWER
The most powerful axis of activism today is vertical rather than horizontal. The depth of a conversation is more important than how many people are involved in it.
5. RADICAL GOOD WILL AS AN ACT OF POWER
Recognition and affirmation of the spiritual innocence in all human beings creates a field of possibility for the emergence of miracles.
6. CREATING SACRED SPACE AS AN ACT OF POWER
The simple configuration of people gathered in a circle, sharing prayer and meditation and heartfelt conversation, casts a web of healing power affecting not only the members of the circle but the world at large.
7. SPIRITUALLY CENTERED ACTION AS ACT OF POWER
The New Activist wields power by standing for what could be, as opposed to fighting what is. Making a stand for a new possibility, we attain the power to create it.
Pretty powerful, eh?
And speaking of activism on a slightly different tangent, there's a good chance I could be in the Himalayas in the spring working on a new radio series called "The Green Planet Monitor". For some reason, any of my ideas about staying in one place for a long time just don't seem to be gathering any steam. I think my address for a while is supposed to be No Fixed Address. And hey, why not?
One of my friends remarked that this must be really stressful for me to not have a home. But really, it's not. I've done this many times before and there's something about wandering around that I really like.
Just wish I could get this Hamilton house situation wrapped up so that I can have no ties to place at all. That's the only thing really dragging me down right now .. and also because as long as Barry and I co-own the house, we can't really walk away from each other as we both would like to do right now. But maybe there's a gift in that somewhere too ... think I'd better go sit on the dock and meditate for a while.
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Leavin' the City
I just don't want to live in a city anymore. At least not full time anyway. Today I got in the car and headed up north to my mom and dad's place in South River (about 3 hours north of Toronto for them what aren't from around these parts). The further I got from Hamilton, the better I felt. And now it's real good.
It's turning out to be a red fall. Few leaves turning until around Orillia. The air is very cool with hints of winter. A roaring fire is a wonderful luxury and the lake view from outside my bedroom window is peaceful and healing and calming.
Part of me is tempted to stay here for the winter and see what the springtime brings. The east coast still beckons, though. And if I can get out there before the snow starts to fly and the geese are all gone I might still do it.
Back in southern Ontario again sometime either Sunday or Monday. In the meantime, I am really glad to be here.
Oh, and Happy Birthday, Cyndy (my sister). And Happy Michaelmas Day (the feast Day of St. Michael, Guardian Overlord of the Angelic Hosts (or, in layperson's terms -- Head Angel.)
He is often invoked to intercede against The Powers of Evil, Temptation, Storms at Sea and any times when fear and negativity are present. And because it is fall and the light is diminishing, this is the time when the light of Archangel Michael is often called upon.
He is also the patron saint of hatmakers and there is a lovely daisy (the Michaelmas Daisy) named after him. I would imagine that a hat with Michaelmas daisies on it would be a good thing indeed (I bought 10 hats this summer .. maybe this needs to be my 11th)
Thought you would all like to know in case you're feeling a bit fearful and need some more light in your life.
It's turning out to be a red fall. Few leaves turning until around Orillia. The air is very cool with hints of winter. A roaring fire is a wonderful luxury and the lake view from outside my bedroom window is peaceful and healing and calming.
Part of me is tempted to stay here for the winter and see what the springtime brings. The east coast still beckons, though. And if I can get out there before the snow starts to fly and the geese are all gone I might still do it.
Back in southern Ontario again sometime either Sunday or Monday. In the meantime, I am really glad to be here.
Oh, and Happy Birthday, Cyndy (my sister). And Happy Michaelmas Day (the feast Day of St. Michael, Guardian Overlord of the Angelic Hosts (or, in layperson's terms -- Head Angel.)
He is often invoked to intercede against The Powers of Evil, Temptation, Storms at Sea and any times when fear and negativity are present. And because it is fall and the light is diminishing, this is the time when the light of Archangel Michael is often called upon.
He is also the patron saint of hatmakers and there is a lovely daisy (the Michaelmas Daisy) named after him. I would imagine that a hat with Michaelmas daisies on it would be a good thing indeed (I bought 10 hats this summer .. maybe this needs to be my 11th)
Thought you would all like to know in case you're feeling a bit fearful and need some more light in your life.
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Ramblin' on
I promise I'll post a picture one of these days for some eye candy. I don't have a digital camera right now and all my pix are on my other computer which is not hooked up to the internet. Soon. Soon.
Still wanderin' around, going from place to place and remembering that many societies have lived like this. Only they didn't have a car to use as a storage locker.
I've been pretty bummed out about this house situation ... it feels better when I remind myself that property is a pretty emotional thing, bringing up all kinds of issue of security, territoriality and a mix of other things. I don't think we're really in our right minds when we're doing the real estate regardless of whether one is a buyer or a seller.
At this point, I'm quickly deciding not to let this delay my trip indefinitely. I'm going sometime between October 20 and 31. I will be fine, I tell myself. The explorers of olde left their homeland with much less than I have. I will be fine.
I am working on the whole issue of detachment from material things, at the same time as working on getting more grounded in the material world. Sounds like a contradiction? Actually, it's not. We can only detach from the world when we feel secure in it. So that's what I am working on.
I also remind myself that one of my heroes is Dorothy Day, co-founder of the Catholic Worker Movement. Throughout her life, she worked on building a movement devoted to social justice. For her, that meant freeing herself from the trappings of material success. The Catholic Worker, a newspaper which is still being published today, as well as her many Catholic Worker houses were built on no material security. Just God's grace. She did a lot of good, and one of the reasons is because she wasn't afraid.
I am trying to be fearless too. It's a long, slow process but it's getting easier every day as long as I remember what's really important and what isn't. Which sometimes happens for 10 minutes a day!
Still wanderin' around, going from place to place and remembering that many societies have lived like this. Only they didn't have a car to use as a storage locker.
I've been pretty bummed out about this house situation ... it feels better when I remind myself that property is a pretty emotional thing, bringing up all kinds of issue of security, territoriality and a mix of other things. I don't think we're really in our right minds when we're doing the real estate regardless of whether one is a buyer or a seller.
At this point, I'm quickly deciding not to let this delay my trip indefinitely. I'm going sometime between October 20 and 31. I will be fine, I tell myself. The explorers of olde left their homeland with much less than I have. I will be fine.
I am working on the whole issue of detachment from material things, at the same time as working on getting more grounded in the material world. Sounds like a contradiction? Actually, it's not. We can only detach from the world when we feel secure in it. So that's what I am working on.
I also remind myself that one of my heroes is Dorothy Day, co-founder of the Catholic Worker Movement. Throughout her life, she worked on building a movement devoted to social justice. For her, that meant freeing herself from the trappings of material success. The Catholic Worker, a newspaper which is still being published today, as well as her many Catholic Worker houses were built on no material security. Just God's grace. She did a lot of good, and one of the reasons is because she wasn't afraid.
I am trying to be fearless too. It's a long, slow process but it's getting easier every day as long as I remember what's really important and what isn't. Which sometimes happens for 10 minutes a day!
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Getting skunked
I did a whole blog entry yesterday morning about Ursula getting skunked. And then I got skunked by the internet -- I went to post it and something weird happened and I lost it all.
So we both feel like we're getting skunked all over the place. and I am still getting skunked by the real estate business. House still isn't sold. I am still waiting to get out of here and see how much money I'm going to have to get there. My house is almost empty so I am taking many friends up on their gracious offer of places to stay.
the good thing about all of this is that I sure feel loved. Big thanks to The Other Victoria of London and her family for inviting us to stay there. and also for their assistance on Friday night after Ursula had her encounter with the skunk.
Now I am at Nadene and Darren's in Brampton. What can you say about friends who offer up their bathtub for a smelly dog to have a tomato juice bath in, and then say, no, she doesn't have to sleep outside all night. She doesn't smell that bad ... (she now smells like a skunk living outside the Heinz tomato factory in Leamington close to where I grew up).
By the way, I got a tomato juice bath too. I figured the cleanest way to go about it was to get in the bathtub with her. So I probably smell like Leamington on a juice-producing day too.
FYI -- I am off to Tina's place tonight, and staying with her kids tomorrow. Back to Nadene and Darren's tomorrow night. Pit stop at the Hamilton house this afternoon to put in a load of laundry and unload some of the excess baggage in my car.
As usual, the best way to contact me is by email. Or cell phone even if I am way over my allotted minutes per month. Oh well, it's a cost of living that can't be avoided unless I want to be totally cut off. Which I don't.
More later. I"m doing fine even if I am terribly frustrated at the recent turn of events.
So we both feel like we're getting skunked all over the place. and I am still getting skunked by the real estate business. House still isn't sold. I am still waiting to get out of here and see how much money I'm going to have to get there. My house is almost empty so I am taking many friends up on their gracious offer of places to stay.
the good thing about all of this is that I sure feel loved. Big thanks to The Other Victoria of London and her family for inviting us to stay there. and also for their assistance on Friday night after Ursula had her encounter with the skunk.
Now I am at Nadene and Darren's in Brampton. What can you say about friends who offer up their bathtub for a smelly dog to have a tomato juice bath in, and then say, no, she doesn't have to sleep outside all night. She doesn't smell that bad ... (she now smells like a skunk living outside the Heinz tomato factory in Leamington close to where I grew up).
By the way, I got a tomato juice bath too. I figured the cleanest way to go about it was to get in the bathtub with her. So I probably smell like Leamington on a juice-producing day too.
FYI -- I am off to Tina's place tonight, and staying with her kids tomorrow. Back to Nadene and Darren's tomorrow night. Pit stop at the Hamilton house this afternoon to put in a load of laundry and unload some of the excess baggage in my car.
As usual, the best way to contact me is by email. Or cell phone even if I am way over my allotted minutes per month. Oh well, it's a cost of living that can't be avoided unless I want to be totally cut off. Which I don't.
More later. I"m doing fine even if I am terribly frustrated at the recent turn of events.
Monday, September 19, 2005
Surprise
Have you ever heard the expression that life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans?
So true this week. Our house deal did not go through. After a weekend of believing that I am seriously screwed, I am now feeling better. Thanks in large part to my friend Victoria (the other one) who gave me a call on Saturday and told to me to get the heck down to her place in London so she can take care of me. So I am down here all week with her and her husband and two daughters. I am starting to realize just how much I need other people around me .. fortunately I have friends who were able to point this out to me even before I realized it myself.
It's easy to look at the downside of all of this, but I am finally starting to see how much more helpful it is to look at the good things that this situation is causing. So many people to help, so many people who care. It's been this way ever since Barry and I split up, and I am very grateful.
I am also proud of how Barry and I both handled this latest problem. .. let's just say that it's all pretty typical of how the real estate game is played by some people. Bottom line is that we play fair. And if the other side doesn't, we can't play with that particular person or people.
And despite what I said in my previous entry on moving day about Barry being bitchy, I saw some glimpses again over the weekend of him at his best. Reminds me of why I still love him. Even though I do know we can't be to each other what we used to be.
So now everything is up in the air. We have another couple who are very hot to put in an offer .. they were disappointed that they missed out last time. So things don't look as bleak as they looked in the middle of the night.
There may be a delay while all this works out and I'm not sure at this point I'll go to Nova Scotia right away or wait until the spring. If I do wait until the spring, I'm thinking of spending the winter in Windsor. There are a lot of good reasons to do this. Since I can't afford to go somewhere warm like California.
I' m still working it out and convincing myself that this isn't the big crisis it appears to be. I have options and people who love me.
More later. I'm doing okay. Not the best I've ever been, but okay.
So true this week. Our house deal did not go through. After a weekend of believing that I am seriously screwed, I am now feeling better. Thanks in large part to my friend Victoria (the other one) who gave me a call on Saturday and told to me to get the heck down to her place in London so she can take care of me. So I am down here all week with her and her husband and two daughters. I am starting to realize just how much I need other people around me .. fortunately I have friends who were able to point this out to me even before I realized it myself.
It's easy to look at the downside of all of this, but I am finally starting to see how much more helpful it is to look at the good things that this situation is causing. So many people to help, so many people who care. It's been this way ever since Barry and I split up, and I am very grateful.
I am also proud of how Barry and I both handled this latest problem. .. let's just say that it's all pretty typical of how the real estate game is played by some people. Bottom line is that we play fair. And if the other side doesn't, we can't play with that particular person or people.
And despite what I said in my previous entry on moving day about Barry being bitchy, I saw some glimpses again over the weekend of him at his best. Reminds me of why I still love him. Even though I do know we can't be to each other what we used to be.
So now everything is up in the air. We have another couple who are very hot to put in an offer .. they were disappointed that they missed out last time. So things don't look as bleak as they looked in the middle of the night.
There may be a delay while all this works out and I'm not sure at this point I'll go to Nova Scotia right away or wait until the spring. If I do wait until the spring, I'm thinking of spending the winter in Windsor. There are a lot of good reasons to do this. Since I can't afford to go somewhere warm like California.
I' m still working it out and convincing myself that this isn't the big crisis it appears to be. I have options and people who love me.
More later. I'm doing okay. Not the best I've ever been, but okay.
Thursday, September 15, 2005
The Diggers had it Right
Don't know how many of you have heard the story of the Diggers, a bunch of folks way back in jolly olde England who tried to set up a town on somebody else's land.
There's a song written about them with the line "No Man has any Right to Buy and Sell the Earth for Private Gain".
Ah yes, real estate was a dirty game even back then.
Tomorrow our house is supposed to close. I am reminded once again why I firmly believe that the buying and selling of property is a black and evil art.
Wrinkles have emerged. Seems the new buyer doesn't understand what the term "unconditional" means. But our lawyer has assured us that yes, they have bought our house and cannot get out of it without it costing them.
Whether our lawyer is going to have to be more emphatic on this point still remains to be seen. The only thing I am enjoying about this is that the buying and selling of real estate is like swimming with sharks. This is one of the only places in life when I feel comfortable being a shark along with everybody else. I'm enjoying being very expressive with my real estate agent and lawyer about how displeased I am ...
Cue: "oh the shark has many teeth dear ...
and she shows them pearly white" (from Mac the Knife, if you don't recognize the song).
And we have at least two other prospective buyers. The problem people can go suck air.
There's a song written about them with the line "No Man has any Right to Buy and Sell the Earth for Private Gain".
Ah yes, real estate was a dirty game even back then.
Tomorrow our house is supposed to close. I am reminded once again why I firmly believe that the buying and selling of property is a black and evil art.
Wrinkles have emerged. Seems the new buyer doesn't understand what the term "unconditional" means. But our lawyer has assured us that yes, they have bought our house and cannot get out of it without it costing them.
Whether our lawyer is going to have to be more emphatic on this point still remains to be seen. The only thing I am enjoying about this is that the buying and selling of real estate is like swimming with sharks. This is one of the only places in life when I feel comfortable being a shark along with everybody else. I'm enjoying being very expressive with my real estate agent and lawyer about how displeased I am ...
Cue: "oh the shark has many teeth dear ...
and she shows them pearly white" (from Mac the Knife, if you don't recognize the song).
And we have at least two other prospective buyers. The problem people can go suck air.
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Loving What Is
The Way I Want to Feel all the Time
Hey folks -- it's been a while.
This picture was taken up at my mom and dad's place on Eagle Lake near North Bay Ontario a couple of weeks ago. It was an incredible week on the lake and I felt so good.
I need to remember that. I'm doing well, all things considering but am a little bogged right now. The house closes on Friday -- good word for it, eh? "Closes" -- not just "sells". It's closure.
Doesn't feel like that right now. The last boxes are always the hardest ones to pack up. And I just sorted through the Christmas decorations to pack a few to take with me back to Bear River. Went through old Christmas cards. It was like walking backwards. And yeah, it hurt but I think I'm at the point where I can let it.
And now I'm feeling better, ready to move a few more boxes. I need to remember the feeling that I had when I threw my hands up in the air that day on the lake and said "Whatever".
I almost am able to mean that ... some days more than others. Learning to let go ... let things be what they are. And even learning how to enjoy what they are. Even if it's not exactly what we had in mind for ourselves.
Sometimes there are better plans in the wind ... if we can just ride with it.
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Bringing it all up to date
I've been home a couple of days now. Tomorrow I head off to Montreal for a conference so wanted to bring about some closure to the summer trip part of my blog.
I think, for a while at least, I will keep updating just so all of you have a central place where you can keep track of my comings and goings. The conference I am going to is called "In and Out of the Sound Studio", and it's going to be a dynamic gathering of women who work in sound studio environments. Including some wonderful friends from different parts of the country I have not seen in a while.
To give you a better idea of where I am, here is a message I put out on my VF Friends email list. Some of you would have gotten it already via email, others not.
Hi everybody -- I know it's been a while since you've heard from me.
It's been six weeks of major changes, growth and wonderful things
mixed in with some tears and all those conflicting emotions that
changes bring.
I've just returned from the beautiful Nova Scotia village of Bear
River. You can see what it looks like by going to either a) my blog
at http://magneticspirits.blogspot.com or
http://www.bearriver.ca (a beautifully done website)
As some of you know, I have been in the process of splitting with my
partner of 21 years. Just being in Bear River with my wonderful
friends Simone and Timothy, waking up in the morning to a clear sky
and feeling the fresh dampness of the morning was just what I needed
to reinforce the idea that I am alive, happy, and able to deal with
whatever comes next. And feasts of lobster and scallops with many
bottles of wine helped a lot too.
I am back in Hamilton now and have decided to go back to Nova Scotia
by the end of September to live.
This list is the most efficient way to let you all know .. my
apologies that I can't call each of you and tell you personally.
In the coming month, both Barry and I will be selling all but our
most favourite things. So if there's anything we have that you need
or want, let me know. Even if you're short of cash .. we've got
excess kitchen stuff, garden tools, sheets and towels etc. that some
of you could use. So speak up.
And drop by if you're in the neighbourhood. I expect the For Sale
sign will go up in a couple of weeks but I'll be here for the next
little while. I hope I'll get the chance to see most of you before I
go. And that I get lots of visitors after I get settled in. A guest
room is a big priority in any new house I buy (I've got my eye on a
cute little white cottage with a wrap around veranda ... 170 years
old and just perfect for Ursula (my dog) and me.
In the meantime, my documentary workshop "Mining the Memory Bank"
with Steve Wadhams is still on for August 12-14. So sign up and join
us. I also hope to be doing another workshop before I take off in
September. I can do media, music or meditation .. if you have a
request about what you'd like me to do, let me know and I'll see
about setting something up.
It's all good. Doesn't always feel like it now, but it is. Thanks
to all of you who constantly remind me of this.
Love
Victoria
I think, for a while at least, I will keep updating just so all of you have a central place where you can keep track of my comings and goings. The conference I am going to is called "In and Out of the Sound Studio", and it's going to be a dynamic gathering of women who work in sound studio environments. Including some wonderful friends from different parts of the country I have not seen in a while.
To give you a better idea of where I am, here is a message I put out on my VF Friends email list. Some of you would have gotten it already via email, others not.
Hi everybody -- I know it's been a while since you've heard from me.
It's been six weeks of major changes, growth and wonderful things
mixed in with some tears and all those conflicting emotions that
changes bring.
I've just returned from the beautiful Nova Scotia village of Bear
River. You can see what it looks like by going to either a) my blog
at http://magneticspirits.blogspot.com or
http://www.bearriver.ca (a beautifully done website)
As some of you know, I have been in the process of splitting with my
partner of 21 years. Just being in Bear River with my wonderful
friends Simone and Timothy, waking up in the morning to a clear sky
and feeling the fresh dampness of the morning was just what I needed
to reinforce the idea that I am alive, happy, and able to deal with
whatever comes next. And feasts of lobster and scallops with many
bottles of wine helped a lot too.
I am back in Hamilton now and have decided to go back to Nova Scotia
by the end of September to live.
This list is the most efficient way to let you all know .. my
apologies that I can't call each of you and tell you personally.
In the coming month, both Barry and I will be selling all but our
most favourite things. So if there's anything we have that you need
or want, let me know. Even if you're short of cash .. we've got
excess kitchen stuff, garden tools, sheets and towels etc. that some
of you could use. So speak up.
And drop by if you're in the neighbourhood. I expect the For Sale
sign will go up in a couple of weeks but I'll be here for the next
little while. I hope I'll get the chance to see most of you before I
go. And that I get lots of visitors after I get settled in. A guest
room is a big priority in any new house I buy (I've got my eye on a
cute little white cottage with a wrap around veranda ... 170 years
old and just perfect for Ursula (my dog) and me.
In the meantime, my documentary workshop "Mining the Memory Bank"
with Steve Wadhams is still on for August 12-14. So sign up and join
us. I also hope to be doing another workshop before I take off in
September. I can do media, music or meditation .. if you have a
request about what you'd like me to do, let me know and I'll see
about setting something up.
It's all good. Doesn't always feel like it now, but it is. Thanks
to all of you who constantly remind me of this.
Love
Victoria
Sunday, July 17, 2005
My Hand was on the National
(I was going to called this entry "I scrummed the Prime Minister" but that sounds really disgusting.)
I really did see my hand on the National, though. And also on ATV.
Continuing on from my previous entry, Simone gathered up the three little boys, Timothy gathered up his camera and I gathered up my recording gear and we set off to join the media conference with the Prime Minister at the Annapolis Royal Historic Gardens. Simone, Ben, Max and Sammy weren't going to be at the press conference but Simone was determined to have her little boys' picture taken with the PM. She stayed at the gate (and did manage to get her picture), and Tim and I went inside to where the media were gathered.
I haven't done much newswork in the past. I have only been in a couple of scrums, and this particular event reinforced my idea that scrums are one of the biggest wastes of time that modern media has invented. First of all, everything is all staged. Picture 15 cameras and 30 people with tape recorders and notebooks all milling around jockeying for the best position in the pack. Frequently bitching at each other "you're blocking my shot". Simone, who was watching from afar, even saw a major network reporter shove a young reporter out of the way because she was where he thought he had the right to be. Because he was with CTV, ya know.
So, enter the PM through the rose arbour, being escorted by the director of the Gardens. This location had been prearranged by the PM's media handler as Station #1. Couldn't get close enough to hear what they were saying but it looked like they were talking about the roses.
Photo-op at Station #1 over, we were then herded to Station #2 to set up before the arrival of the PM who was looking at more flowers. Imagine the pack of us, many with heavy cameras on their shoulders, running to the next station, leaping over rose bushes on the way. Why we had to run, I don't know. It's not like there was anything urgent happening. The PM wasn't going anywhere quickly and neither were the flowers. And really, how often does anything urgent ever happen in Canada anyway?
Then on from Station #2 to Station #3. Station #3 was where we were allowed to ask questions. I was doing audio. Which meant I was holding the microphone, getting as close to the PM as I could, kneeling down on the ground so my head wasn't in the camera shot. There is something very strange about being on one's knees two feet in front of the Prime Minister staring up at him from below thrusting out a raised microphone. It felt like I was begging. For good clip.
On to the questions. Of course, nobody thought to ask about the reason why the PM was there, except for Timothy because his piece was about the 400th anniversary celebrations. The other reporters asked about a) why Ottawa wasn't going to give New Brunswick money to refit its nuclear reactor b) the latest US decision on mad cow c) some illworded remarks by the Chief of Defence and d) (couldn't believe this one) .. when are you going to call a by-election to replace the MP whose funeral the PM was going to be the next day. The PM, to his credit, said something to the effect of hey look, can we bury the guy first? Of course, he phrased it more elegantly than that but it was obvious he thought the question was in very bad taste.
Sigh ... why is it acceptable for media people to have such bad manners??
Reinforces my idea that I just don't want to do big media anymore. Except once in a while for a bit of ironic fun. Instead, I will continue to soldier on in the trenches, asking questions that are not always well received. And keep on working to build upon my belief that the media can be a place for respectful dialogue and which doesn't treat people like the "product" to be used to create the commodity -- "the story".
I really did see my hand on the National, though. And also on ATV.
Continuing on from my previous entry, Simone gathered up the three little boys, Timothy gathered up his camera and I gathered up my recording gear and we set off to join the media conference with the Prime Minister at the Annapolis Royal Historic Gardens. Simone, Ben, Max and Sammy weren't going to be at the press conference but Simone was determined to have her little boys' picture taken with the PM. She stayed at the gate (and did manage to get her picture), and Tim and I went inside to where the media were gathered.
I haven't done much newswork in the past. I have only been in a couple of scrums, and this particular event reinforced my idea that scrums are one of the biggest wastes of time that modern media has invented. First of all, everything is all staged. Picture 15 cameras and 30 people with tape recorders and notebooks all milling around jockeying for the best position in the pack. Frequently bitching at each other "you're blocking my shot". Simone, who was watching from afar, even saw a major network reporter shove a young reporter out of the way because she was where he thought he had the right to be. Because he was with CTV, ya know.
So, enter the PM through the rose arbour, being escorted by the director of the Gardens. This location had been prearranged by the PM's media handler as Station #1. Couldn't get close enough to hear what they were saying but it looked like they were talking about the roses.
Photo-op at Station #1 over, we were then herded to Station #2 to set up before the arrival of the PM who was looking at more flowers. Imagine the pack of us, many with heavy cameras on their shoulders, running to the next station, leaping over rose bushes on the way. Why we had to run, I don't know. It's not like there was anything urgent happening. The PM wasn't going anywhere quickly and neither were the flowers. And really, how often does anything urgent ever happen in Canada anyway?
Then on from Station #2 to Station #3. Station #3 was where we were allowed to ask questions. I was doing audio. Which meant I was holding the microphone, getting as close to the PM as I could, kneeling down on the ground so my head wasn't in the camera shot. There is something very strange about being on one's knees two feet in front of the Prime Minister staring up at him from below thrusting out a raised microphone. It felt like I was begging. For good clip.
On to the questions. Of course, nobody thought to ask about the reason why the PM was there, except for Timothy because his piece was about the 400th anniversary celebrations. The other reporters asked about a) why Ottawa wasn't going to give New Brunswick money to refit its nuclear reactor b) the latest US decision on mad cow c) some illworded remarks by the Chief of Defence and d) (couldn't believe this one) .. when are you going to call a by-election to replace the MP whose funeral the PM was going to be the next day. The PM, to his credit, said something to the effect of hey look, can we bury the guy first? Of course, he phrased it more elegantly than that but it was obvious he thought the question was in very bad taste.
Sigh ... why is it acceptable for media people to have such bad manners??
Reinforces my idea that I just don't want to do big media anymore. Except once in a while for a bit of ironic fun. Instead, I will continue to soldier on in the trenches, asking questions that are not always well received. And keep on working to build upon my belief that the media can be a place for respectful dialogue and which doesn't treat people like the "product" to be used to create the commodity -- "the story".
Prime Ministers and French explorers
It's been quite a hectic and fun couple of days. My friend and colleague Tim asked me to do sound on his film crew for the 400th anniversary of the first known permanent settlement in North America. Didja know that the founding of Port Royal in Nova Scotia predates the landing at Plymouth Rock? I didn't.
So it's been a big deal. Thursday night we were heading out to Port Royal to go to the dress rehearsal of the meeting between the Frency and the Mi kmaq, and we were driving through Annapolis Royal, which is where the Fort was later established. And we saw the Prime Minister just standing there on a street corner.
So then we went to the rehearsal. After the rehearsal we heading back to Annapolis, mostly at the urging of Simone, allegedly to get ice cream for the boys. Of course the real intent was to see if we could spot the PM again.
One of the funnier moments in an evening filled with funny moments was when a teenager on a park bench said to us "the prime minister is here, you know". He then proceeded to tell us "he came up and talked to me and shook my hand. I didn't even know who he was". Further conversation revealed that he wasn't even Canadian, he was from Florida. Then he said "so, that would be like me shaking the hand of George Bush in my own country. Wow. That just SO wouldn't happen".
We finally found the PM .. or at least we found his two security guards. They were pretty good sports. Memorable line #1 - Simone saying "hey, if he needs babies to kiss, I have three of them right here .." Then the security guard saying "there's no election" and Simone responding "are you sure ...?"
Tim then went back and schmoozed the security guard and got us in to the media scrum the next day. I'm running out of steam right now and I haven't had coffee yet. So I'm going to quit for now. Later on I will continue with the story of what it's like to scrum the prime minister (sounds sleazy, doesn't it? Let me tell you, that's not far from the truth).
So it's been a big deal. Thursday night we were heading out to Port Royal to go to the dress rehearsal of the meeting between the Frency and the Mi kmaq, and we were driving through Annapolis Royal, which is where the Fort was later established. And we saw the Prime Minister just standing there on a street corner.
So then we went to the rehearsal. After the rehearsal we heading back to Annapolis, mostly at the urging of Simone, allegedly to get ice cream for the boys. Of course the real intent was to see if we could spot the PM again.
One of the funnier moments in an evening filled with funny moments was when a teenager on a park bench said to us "the prime minister is here, you know". He then proceeded to tell us "he came up and talked to me and shook my hand. I didn't even know who he was". Further conversation revealed that he wasn't even Canadian, he was from Florida. Then he said "so, that would be like me shaking the hand of George Bush in my own country. Wow. That just SO wouldn't happen".
We finally found the PM .. or at least we found his two security guards. They were pretty good sports. Memorable line #1 - Simone saying "hey, if he needs babies to kiss, I have three of them right here .." Then the security guard saying "there's no election" and Simone responding "are you sure ...?"
Tim then went back and schmoozed the security guard and got us in to the media scrum the next day. I'm running out of steam right now and I haven't had coffee yet. So I'm going to quit for now. Later on I will continue with the story of what it's like to scrum the prime minister (sounds sleazy, doesn't it? Let me tell you, that's not far from the truth).
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
A couple of days at Prospect Bay
I've been here on the south shore of Nova Scotia since Sunday night, helping my friend and colleague Sean learn how to use Adobe Audition. A curse on the house of Adobe -- they decided to "improve" the program, and in doing so they turned a really easy to use beginner friendly audio program into one that tries the patience. I am now one step closer to moving over to Mac instead of PC.
I am adapting.
Went for many long walks since I got here -- Emily and Sean's house backs onto a nature conservancy that goes all the way down to the water. Nice to have the Atlantic Ocean in the backyard. The ground leading down to the water is much like the tundra -- low growing shrubs and lichen that are springy underfoot. And filling my lungs with the aroma of juniper and peat moss is incredible (I still need more adjectives). I saw a redtailed hawk this morning, which was really special.
I will post some pictures when I get back to Bear River.
The other good thing about meeting Sean is that he is connected with the media arts community here in Halifax and can help me meet more people. He also suggested that I apply for a two year overseas posting with CUSO in Vanautu which is in the south Pacific. I told him not right now -- and he said that he could help get me a communications related gig overseas if I want it.
I leave to go back to the Annapolis Valley today to spend a couple of days with my sister Cyndy. I think we'll take a couple of days and go down to Lunenburg. Then on Sunday, my friend Tim has asked me to help him on a film gig -- he has been hired to shoot the 400th anniversary of the landing of the French at Annapolis Royal. It's a big deal -- the PM is going to be there and everything.
All in all, there are many good things happening and I have now decided for sure to come back here for the winter. Probably in October -- we have a house and a whole bunch of stuff to divide or pass along to whoever wants them. I'll let y'all know when the closeout sale is going to be. Ya, it's sad, but in the words of Ferron (Canadian gravelly-voiced singer) "life don't clickety-clack down a straight line track, it comes together then it comes apart".
For me, it's coming apart but it's also coming together. I'm really okay.
Pictures tomorrow.
I am adapting.
Went for many long walks since I got here -- Emily and Sean's house backs onto a nature conservancy that goes all the way down to the water. Nice to have the Atlantic Ocean in the backyard. The ground leading down to the water is much like the tundra -- low growing shrubs and lichen that are springy underfoot. And filling my lungs with the aroma of juniper and peat moss is incredible (I still need more adjectives). I saw a redtailed hawk this morning, which was really special.
I will post some pictures when I get back to Bear River.
The other good thing about meeting Sean is that he is connected with the media arts community here in Halifax and can help me meet more people. He also suggested that I apply for a two year overseas posting with CUSO in Vanautu which is in the south Pacific. I told him not right now -- and he said that he could help get me a communications related gig overseas if I want it.
I leave to go back to the Annapolis Valley today to spend a couple of days with my sister Cyndy. I think we'll take a couple of days and go down to Lunenburg. Then on Sunday, my friend Tim has asked me to help him on a film gig -- he has been hired to shoot the 400th anniversary of the landing of the French at Annapolis Royal. It's a big deal -- the PM is going to be there and everything.
All in all, there are many good things happening and I have now decided for sure to come back here for the winter. Probably in October -- we have a house and a whole bunch of stuff to divide or pass along to whoever wants them. I'll let y'all know when the closeout sale is going to be. Ya, it's sad, but in the words of Ferron (Canadian gravelly-voiced singer) "life don't clickety-clack down a straight line track, it comes together then it comes apart".
For me, it's coming apart but it's also coming together. I'm really okay.
Pictures tomorrow.
Monday, July 11, 2005
Wow, high speed!
Greetings, all. I am now just outside of Halifax near a village called Prospect. I am doing some work over the next couple of days with Sean Kelly of CUSO. The CUSO Atlantic office is in his house, which is much nicer than being in a stuffy office in Halifax.
Sean's documentary is about an island in the South Pacific which has no trade with the outside world. The controversy is that the World Bank is trying to get them to get with contemporary standards (not that they don't have currency of their own, but trading with pig tusks just isn't anything the world bank wants to deal with. Then again, is trading a pig tusk any stranger than trading pieces of paper with numbers on it and little round medal disks?) Sean went to this place a few months ago and trekked many miles through the bush to get his story. So I am going to help him put it together.
The South Shore has a much different character than the Fundy Shore. I went to Peggy's Cove and walked on the rocks for a while. The clean air, the gently crashing waves, the clear birdsong .. it's just different here.
And I have decided to come back here for the winter, at least for a few months. Don't know exactly why I am hearing the call, but it's not imaginary. Something about this place just makes so much more intuitive sense than the way we live our lives in smoggy, driven Ontario. It's a good time to get away and move into the new chapter of my life story.
I have a lot more pictures to post but I am not on my own computer right now. Things are good. I am looking forward to a long walk tomorrow morning before transporting my ears to a place in the South Pacific where they speak 170 languages. I am sure it will be compelling too.
Sleep well.
Sean's documentary is about an island in the South Pacific which has no trade with the outside world. The controversy is that the World Bank is trying to get them to get with contemporary standards (not that they don't have currency of their own, but trading with pig tusks just isn't anything the world bank wants to deal with. Then again, is trading a pig tusk any stranger than trading pieces of paper with numbers on it and little round medal disks?) Sean went to this place a few months ago and trekked many miles through the bush to get his story. So I am going to help him put it together.
The South Shore has a much different character than the Fundy Shore. I went to Peggy's Cove and walked on the rocks for a while. The clean air, the gently crashing waves, the clear birdsong .. it's just different here.
And I have decided to come back here for the winter, at least for a few months. Don't know exactly why I am hearing the call, but it's not imaginary. Something about this place just makes so much more intuitive sense than the way we live our lives in smoggy, driven Ontario. It's a good time to get away and move into the new chapter of my life story.
I have a lot more pictures to post but I am not on my own computer right now. Things are good. I am looking forward to a long walk tomorrow morning before transporting my ears to a place in the South Pacific where they speak 170 languages. I am sure it will be compelling too.
Sleep well.
Friday, July 08, 2005
Movin' on again
Okay, so this isn't the last post. I've just been in a bit of a mood in the last couple of days. Thinking about coming home and packing up is hanging like a cloud.
On top of that, the next bunch of people have moved into the big house and I'm not feeling comfortable in the coach house anymore -- no direct conflict with me but they are British friends of the guy who owns this place and they are bitchy because they thought they were going to be staying in the coach house too. They are dripping with attitude and I don't want to get to know them any better than I do now.
My friend Simone, who has furnished this place and fixed it up for the owner because she thought he was her friend is ready to take all her furniture back and let them stay in an empty house. The owner had agreed, in exchange for her work, she could offer the place to family and friends and now it seems that the part he didn't say was "but I could kick them out at any time". Simone is a good person and she's been going through hell trying to keep everybody happy. And this is just the latest in a long line of situations like this.
So I'll be at Simone and Tim's until Sunday, then on to Halifax where I have a gig to help someone with a radio documentary. I'll be pitching my tent right beside the ocean and Ursula and I will have a good time exploring another part of the province. Whether I start coming home on Wednesday or come back to Bear River to say goodbye to friends here and Cyndy in Greenwood, I don't know.
It's on to the next thing -- it has been a wonderful time. This latest wrinkle is just an annoyance and my overall feeling as I prepare to leave here is one of gratitude for the many blessings I have received. And wow, the story I could (and likely will) write -- full of eccentric people, battles between social classes, spiritual revelations, conflict of values between rich people from away and poor people from here, treachery .. it is all here. The only thing missing is a good love/lust story thread.
It has been a rich experience indeed.
Now time to clean the coach house so I don't give the away folks stories about how unclean these colonials are. If anybody needs to call, I will be here until noon or 1 pm Eastern time.
On top of that, the next bunch of people have moved into the big house and I'm not feeling comfortable in the coach house anymore -- no direct conflict with me but they are British friends of the guy who owns this place and they are bitchy because they thought they were going to be staying in the coach house too. They are dripping with attitude and I don't want to get to know them any better than I do now.
My friend Simone, who has furnished this place and fixed it up for the owner because she thought he was her friend is ready to take all her furniture back and let them stay in an empty house. The owner had agreed, in exchange for her work, she could offer the place to family and friends and now it seems that the part he didn't say was "but I could kick them out at any time". Simone is a good person and she's been going through hell trying to keep everybody happy. And this is just the latest in a long line of situations like this.
So I'll be at Simone and Tim's until Sunday, then on to Halifax where I have a gig to help someone with a radio documentary. I'll be pitching my tent right beside the ocean and Ursula and I will have a good time exploring another part of the province. Whether I start coming home on Wednesday or come back to Bear River to say goodbye to friends here and Cyndy in Greenwood, I don't know.
It's on to the next thing -- it has been a wonderful time. This latest wrinkle is just an annoyance and my overall feeling as I prepare to leave here is one of gratitude for the many blessings I have received. And wow, the story I could (and likely will) write -- full of eccentric people, battles between social classes, spiritual revelations, conflict of values between rich people from away and poor people from here, treachery .. it is all here. The only thing missing is a good love/lust story thread.
It has been a rich experience indeed.
Now time to clean the coach house so I don't give the away folks stories about how unclean these colonials are. If anybody needs to call, I will be here until noon or 1 pm Eastern time.
Thursday, July 07, 2005
The Last Post
I don't think anybody is actually reading this thing. Or if you are, you're not telling me. So I'll leave the pictures up but there will be no new entries.
BTW, in case anybody IS reading, I am heading back "home" on July 17 and will be there for a few days. Then I'm off to Montreal. Then back to Hamilton for a month to either sell or rent the house.
And then ..???
Still looking for answers. If you have any spare ones lying around, let me me know.
BTW, in case anybody IS reading, I am heading back "home" on July 17 and will be there for a few days. Then I'm off to Montreal. Then back to Hamilton for a month to either sell or rent the house.
And then ..???
Still looking for answers. If you have any spare ones lying around, let me me know.
Monday, July 04, 2005
Saturday, July 02, 2005
Pardon my lack of knowledge..
Further to my last post, Tony just told me that poker is indeed a game of strategy and is not boring. Just the kind we were playing last night was.
What we were doing last night was the kind where everybody gets five cards and everybody sees what everybody else has. Pure chance whether you get a good hand or not.
I was wondering, if this was poker, where all those stories and songs came from about keeping a straight face and bluffing the dealer? So now I know -- this is baby poker and not the real thing.
What we were doing last night was the kind where everybody gets five cards and everybody sees what everybody else has. Pure chance whether you get a good hand or not.
I was wondering, if this was poker, where all those stories and songs came from about keeping a straight face and bluffing the dealer? So now I know -- this is baby poker and not the real thing.
Ramblin', gamblin' women
I have told my sister Cyndy too many times "No, I will not go with you to a casino".
Well, last night I weakened. There was a sign on the door of the Bear River Legion that they were going to have a casino to raise money for the local health centre and Cyndy saw it. So I relented, after explaining to her that she wouldn't be able to win money. Just banana bread, pillows and other kinds of donated prizes.
So we went to the Legion. I found out that poker is totally a random game of chance that requires zero strategy. I lost. And I found it rather boring. Liked the roulette wheel though. Cyndy declared herself the Black Jack Queen, even though at the end of the evening we had less casino dollars to spend than we had bought. Goes to prove that the dealer always wins. Otherwise, why would there be any casinos.
There was also a massage stand there so you could get your angst massaged away after you'd lost at craps. And a fortune teller who could tell you how much you were going to win or lose. The fortune teller wasn't actually a fortune teller -- she was a nice woman dressed in a gypsy outfit who just sat and talked to her customers for $2 a pop. I had a delightful conversation with her -- her name is Paula, she's probably in her 70's, she lives up the hill and has no running water in her house. By choice. Her kids think it's awful and are always offering to pay to get it installed but she thinks some of the old ways are good. Including going to the outhouse -- she spoke with pride about how nice it is. And going to the well to dip out water to make tea and have baths. She loves her life, she loves her town and even if I didn't get my fortune told, I felt very fortunate I had the chance to talk to her.
Today, Simone and I are off to Frenchy's again to find something nice to wear tomorrow (that's the bargain used clothing store where I just found a beaded silk dress for $4, which I will model in a future blogpost for y'all). I'm having a chick party tomorrow night in the coach house and we are having a fashion show of the cool things we've bought for practically no money.
More later - gotta go do some laundry.
Well, last night I weakened. There was a sign on the door of the Bear River Legion that they were going to have a casino to raise money for the local health centre and Cyndy saw it. So I relented, after explaining to her that she wouldn't be able to win money. Just banana bread, pillows and other kinds of donated prizes.
So we went to the Legion. I found out that poker is totally a random game of chance that requires zero strategy. I lost. And I found it rather boring. Liked the roulette wheel though. Cyndy declared herself the Black Jack Queen, even though at the end of the evening we had less casino dollars to spend than we had bought. Goes to prove that the dealer always wins. Otherwise, why would there be any casinos.
There was also a massage stand there so you could get your angst massaged away after you'd lost at craps. And a fortune teller who could tell you how much you were going to win or lose. The fortune teller wasn't actually a fortune teller -- she was a nice woman dressed in a gypsy outfit who just sat and talked to her customers for $2 a pop. I had a delightful conversation with her -- her name is Paula, she's probably in her 70's, she lives up the hill and has no running water in her house. By choice. Her kids think it's awful and are always offering to pay to get it installed but she thinks some of the old ways are good. Including going to the outhouse -- she spoke with pride about how nice it is. And going to the well to dip out water to make tea and have baths. She loves her life, she loves her town and even if I didn't get my fortune told, I felt very fortunate I had the chance to talk to her.
Today, Simone and I are off to Frenchy's again to find something nice to wear tomorrow (that's the bargain used clothing store where I just found a beaded silk dress for $4, which I will model in a future blogpost for y'all). I'm having a chick party tomorrow night in the coach house and we are having a fashion show of the cool things we've bought for practically no money.
More later - gotta go do some laundry.
Friday, July 01, 2005
Bear River
Tide's Out
Happy Canada Day everybody. This is what Bear River looks like with the tide out. Later today I'll take a picture with the tide in. Big change.
Cyndy and Tony are coming over today and we're going to go into Digby to see what's happening there for Canada Day. There's a community ham supper here in Bear River this afternoon. Other than that, I am going to spend the day being thankful we live here and not in George Bushland. And hoping like hell that it never becomes Steven Harperland up here.
O Canada !
Thursday, June 30, 2005
hey Luddites
okay, I'm having a better day today. Things are really good down here and I am very glad I came. Right now I am spending some time after drinking a bit too much wine and gin and tonic -- need coffee for tomorrow morning so? I am writing this while I wait for the effects to wear off and I can drive. It's only 7:30 and the superstore in Digby doesn't close until 9 so there's time yet.
Wow, what to say now? I am planning to post a couple of pictures tomorrow of the tide on Bear River. I've also been spending some time down on the French Shore -- more about that later.
Tomorrow is Canada Day so I'm going to do some Canada Day stuff with my sister Cyndy and her S.O. Tony. We'll likely go into Digby and maybe Annapolis Royal and back here to Bear River for the community ham dinner.
I have lots to say about a lot of things (as usual) but I'm not feeling like it right now.
More later
Wow, what to say now? I am planning to post a couple of pictures tomorrow of the tide on Bear River. I've also been spending some time down on the French Shore -- more about that later.
Tomorrow is Canada Day so I'm going to do some Canada Day stuff with my sister Cyndy and her S.O. Tony. We'll likely go into Digby and maybe Annapolis Royal and back here to Bear River for the community ham dinner.
I have lots to say about a lot of things (as usual) but I'm not feeling like it right now.
More later
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Anybody out there?
Geez, you guys. I feel like I'm shouting out into the world and nobody's hearing me. If I wanted to talk to myself I'd stick with radio.
Ya, I'm in a pissy mood this morning. Still having a good time but I'm not hearing much from anybody. And I'm getting nothing on email except spam and George Lessard.
So where the fuck are the rest of you? Sorry for crabbing at you.
I take that back. I'm not.
Love
Vic
Ya, I'm in a pissy mood this morning. Still having a good time but I'm not hearing much from anybody. And I'm getting nothing on email except spam and George Lessard.
So where the fuck are the rest of you? Sorry for crabbing at you.
I take that back. I'm not.
Love
Vic
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Quiet days ..
Hey everybody .. a couple of you are probably wondering why I haven't posted much in a couple of days. It's been a couple of days of just doing stuff and I haven't felt much like getting poetic in print.
Went to a solstice celebration on Wednesday. Nice people and it was really groovy. Drove back alongside a sun setting in colours of pink and orange reflecting on the blue water. If beauty could kill, I'd be dead by now.
Today I went in to Digby with Simone .. we went down by the docks and watched a fishing boat being unloaded. Big fish .. cod, pollock and halibut they said it was. And then tonight there was a benefit for Les and for Norma here in town .. both of them have cancer so their friends came out and raised some money to help them with money to live on. It's a good community that way.
Tomorrow I think I'll head down to the French Shore, which is the other side of Digby. Still a lively Acadian culture down there and it looks like a cool place to explore. And then tomorrow night, my next door neighbour Robin is opening her new art gallery. She has two themes in her show -- one is focussed on storms and has lots of blacks and greys. The other theme is world domination by Mickey Mouse with some very critical things to say about American culture. There's some really good stuff there in a dark kinda way. I'll post some pictures tomorrow.
Another thing that's very cool -- I offered to do an information session on starting a community radio station and the idea is really catching on. Turns out there are several groups along the Fundy coast who have been thinking along these lines.
Oh, it is indeed a time of adventure and new possibilities.
Went to a solstice celebration on Wednesday. Nice people and it was really groovy. Drove back alongside a sun setting in colours of pink and orange reflecting on the blue water. If beauty could kill, I'd be dead by now.
Today I went in to Digby with Simone .. we went down by the docks and watched a fishing boat being unloaded. Big fish .. cod, pollock and halibut they said it was. And then tonight there was a benefit for Les and for Norma here in town .. both of them have cancer so their friends came out and raised some money to help them with money to live on. It's a good community that way.
Tomorrow I think I'll head down to the French Shore, which is the other side of Digby. Still a lively Acadian culture down there and it looks like a cool place to explore. And then tomorrow night, my next door neighbour Robin is opening her new art gallery. She has two themes in her show -- one is focussed on storms and has lots of blacks and greys. The other theme is world domination by Mickey Mouse with some very critical things to say about American culture. There's some really good stuff there in a dark kinda way. I'll post some pictures tomorrow.
Another thing that's very cool -- I offered to do an information session on starting a community radio station and the idea is really catching on. Turns out there are several groups along the Fundy coast who have been thinking along these lines.
Oh, it is indeed a time of adventure and new possibilities.
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
Our Baby from the Sea
Our Baby from the Sea
The other day, Simone gave me a call and suggested we take the boys and go for a picnic at Sandy Cove. It was a beautiful sunny day and so we did. We had sandwiches, sand cookies, sandwatermelon, and sand in our shoes .. despite being a rather gritty experience it was good to find a soft sandy beach because so many beaches around here are rocky.
After our sandpicnic we headed down the beach. The little boys saw her first .. she was so small, so friendly and she came right up to the boys. Being the protective mama, Simone held them back but crouched down and talked to the baby seal. Some kind of bond happened between them -- Simone says she doesn't know if the seal was trying to talk to her, or to Sammy (on her back). Was it baby trying to talk to mama, or a baby talking to another baby?
We went back down the beach a ways thinking that our presence was keeping her from going back into the water. We went back half an hour later and she was still there. She started to use her little flippers to come towards us when she saw us, and when we went to leave, she tried to follow us. Just like a little puppy.
She eventually did go back into the water. We also saw four adult seals kicking and splashing out in the water. We were worried that she lost her mama, but we had to just let it go and realize that the sea would take care of her. Ben and Max wanted to bring her home, of course.
Simone and I still don't know what the little gal was trying to say to us. Maybe we aren't supposed to figure it out.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Sunday, June 19, 2005
When the Tide Goes Out ...
Thanks to the good friends out there who have been able to see past my chirpiness and ask how I REALLY am. You know me so well.
So I thought I'd share a bit of the less happy side .. partly to reassure you all that I really am doing well. My moments of sadness still come ... I had a cryin' day today but there are many things around me that remind me that tears are just a part of the process when big changes happen, not the whole thing.
So this morning I got up and did a lot of yoga .. a good yoga session can often release stuck feelings and this morning it did. But the sun came out for the first time since I got here, I got to hang a load of wash on the line and I felt all renewed in some basic way.
Then Ursula and I went for a walk up-hill. WAAAY uphill to the top of the mountain to the Bear River Mi kmaq (pronounced MIG-maw) reserve. We stopped in at the Beartown Basket Company and had a great conversation with Chief Greg McEwan about buying video cameras and doing documentaries. And he made me a Spirit Wand .. hard to describe what it is except that it's great as a musical instrument and maybe even casting spells. Haven't tried that yet.
The trip down was a lot easier. Gravity is such a good thing when you're coming down the mountains. One of the best things was a certain part of the road where I could hear the waterfalls of upper Bear River. Very powerful sound.
Then when I was almost home, I picked a big bouquet of purple lupins, yellow lilies and white and yellow daisies. They grow wild and are stunning to look at. I have a bouquet in a vase in the middle of my table reminding me of all the beauty and goodness there is in this place and in this world and in the hearts of me and others.
And another thing I do to keep cryin' days at bay .. I cry as long as I need to then put on some good ol' rock and roll. Bach just doesn't do it on days like this. I need energy.
Time to take Ursula for a walk. The tide is in full right now. Like my friend Simone told me last time I was here .. looking at the river is one of the most healing things about Bear River. The tide goes out, the river empties, but it always fills right back up.
Thanks for caring. I'm doing well.
So I thought I'd share a bit of the less happy side .. partly to reassure you all that I really am doing well. My moments of sadness still come ... I had a cryin' day today but there are many things around me that remind me that tears are just a part of the process when big changes happen, not the whole thing.
So this morning I got up and did a lot of yoga .. a good yoga session can often release stuck feelings and this morning it did. But the sun came out for the first time since I got here, I got to hang a load of wash on the line and I felt all renewed in some basic way.
Then Ursula and I went for a walk up-hill. WAAAY uphill to the top of the mountain to the Bear River Mi kmaq (pronounced MIG-maw) reserve. We stopped in at the Beartown Basket Company and had a great conversation with Chief Greg McEwan about buying video cameras and doing documentaries. And he made me a Spirit Wand .. hard to describe what it is except that it's great as a musical instrument and maybe even casting spells. Haven't tried that yet.
The trip down was a lot easier. Gravity is such a good thing when you're coming down the mountains. One of the best things was a certain part of the road where I could hear the waterfalls of upper Bear River. Very powerful sound.
Then when I was almost home, I picked a big bouquet of purple lupins, yellow lilies and white and yellow daisies. They grow wild and are stunning to look at. I have a bouquet in a vase in the middle of my table reminding me of all the beauty and goodness there is in this place and in this world and in the hearts of me and others.
And another thing I do to keep cryin' days at bay .. I cry as long as I need to then put on some good ol' rock and roll. Bach just doesn't do it on days like this. I need energy.
Time to take Ursula for a walk. The tide is in full right now. Like my friend Simone told me last time I was here .. looking at the river is one of the most healing things about Bear River. The tide goes out, the river empties, but it always fills right back up.
Thanks for caring. I'm doing well.
Saturday, June 18, 2005
The wheels are turning
Had a lovely afternoon touring the area with Tim, Simone, Ben (age 4), Max (age 3) and Sammy (one tomorrow). We also went for a lot of walks .. very slow ones. It's good to slow down. they are a lot of fun .. stopping to see a fire truck was the big deal today.
We drove along the coast of the Annapolis Basin and looked at a lot of water, a lot of rocky beaches and a lot of real estate. I am thinking it would be so good to live in Ontario 6 months out of the year (because the funding for my projects is better in Ontario) and then come out here for 6 months out of the year. There are lots of houses that would make really good arts retreat centres with just the right atmosphere.
Oh, the ideas never quit. I am thinking that I may never come home. But then I get thinking about all those pictures I've seen of Nova Scotia snowfalls and think that maybe the summer here is the best idea.
After having galavanted all over two counties this morning (AND found a new Frenchy's!) it's time to stay home tonight. Got some fits of writing coming on. And piano to be played. I would love to go get a bottle of wine -- my Muse (aka Creative Spirit) gets really playful when she has a bit of wine. But I have promised myself that I might be able to buy one of the gorgeous hats I tried on last week if I save up my money (there is a stunning purple broadbrimmed hat with an ostrich feather that I am lusting after. All it will take is the cost of 6 cheap bottles of wine and I've got it. Tonight I can count bottle #1 foregone towards the price.)
There have been a couple of allusions to the infamous Frenchy's so far on this blog. Frenchy's, for all of you uninitiated, is kind of like Value Village but much more chaotic, rustic and much better buys if you look carefully. The other day I bought a suit handmade in Indonesia with mother of pearl buttons and shiny silky patches of fabric and embroidery on the collar and pockets. Brand new -- still had the label on it -- and it only cost me 8 bucks for a pair of pants, a sleeveless top and matching pants. Easily a $200 suit. It is perfect for art openings -- countercultural in an elegant kind of way.
Well, must go put on supper ... without wine ... oh, the sacrifice we make for gorgeous hats and other things of beauty.
I'm still thinking of not coming home ...
We drove along the coast of the Annapolis Basin and looked at a lot of water, a lot of rocky beaches and a lot of real estate. I am thinking it would be so good to live in Ontario 6 months out of the year (because the funding for my projects is better in Ontario) and then come out here for 6 months out of the year. There are lots of houses that would make really good arts retreat centres with just the right atmosphere.
Oh, the ideas never quit. I am thinking that I may never come home. But then I get thinking about all those pictures I've seen of Nova Scotia snowfalls and think that maybe the summer here is the best idea.
After having galavanted all over two counties this morning (AND found a new Frenchy's!) it's time to stay home tonight. Got some fits of writing coming on. And piano to be played. I would love to go get a bottle of wine -- my Muse (aka Creative Spirit) gets really playful when she has a bit of wine. But I have promised myself that I might be able to buy one of the gorgeous hats I tried on last week if I save up my money (there is a stunning purple broadbrimmed hat with an ostrich feather that I am lusting after. All it will take is the cost of 6 cheap bottles of wine and I've got it. Tonight I can count bottle #1 foregone towards the price.)
There have been a couple of allusions to the infamous Frenchy's so far on this blog. Frenchy's, for all of you uninitiated, is kind of like Value Village but much more chaotic, rustic and much better buys if you look carefully. The other day I bought a suit handmade in Indonesia with mother of pearl buttons and shiny silky patches of fabric and embroidery on the collar and pockets. Brand new -- still had the label on it -- and it only cost me 8 bucks for a pair of pants, a sleeveless top and matching pants. Easily a $200 suit. It is perfect for art openings -- countercultural in an elegant kind of way.
Well, must go put on supper ... without wine ... oh, the sacrifice we make for gorgeous hats and other things of beauty.
I'm still thinking of not coming home ...
Friday, June 17, 2005
72 Hours in Bear River
I don't know where to begin. It's just beautiful here. I"m settling in nicely, Ursula and I have gone for some good walks up many steep hills. I went to yoga last night, and between yoga and the hills, I am really starting to feel my legs under me.
For the first couple of days I just hung out, had lunch with Robin my next door neighbour (who's opening her new gallery on June 25). I've also been over to Tim and Simone's a couple of times for dinner. I've already been asked if I will do a sound art workshop for the local artists, so I am having a pot luck and sound thing over here in the carriage house next week (it's a great performance space ... I feel like I'm living in a theatre). I've also offered to do an information session on starting a community radio station because this is the perfect place to have one. And I just got an email from a friend in Halifax asking if I can come down to help him for a couple of days on his documentary. So I'm even getting some paid work ...
It's feeling really good. This afternoon I'm going to go pick some flowers .. the lilacs are still in bloom and there are lupins everywhere.
I am getting so many ideas for new things to do. That's all for now .. I wrote something longer yesterday but for some reason the computer lost it. So I'm going to keep it short.
Still working on how to upload pictures from my camera. I have a lot of good ones so I will work on it.
The dogs just came in ... they sure get my attention. In the next couple of days I'll devote a whole chapter to Ursula, Seamus and Bronx. They're quite a team .. big enough between the three of them to pull a dog sled.
Hey, how about adding some comments, folks! That's what these blog things are for. I feel like I'm talking to myself here. All you have to do is click on the word "comment" on the bottom and a screen pops right up. Easy.
For the first couple of days I just hung out, had lunch with Robin my next door neighbour (who's opening her new gallery on June 25). I've also been over to Tim and Simone's a couple of times for dinner. I've already been asked if I will do a sound art workshop for the local artists, so I am having a pot luck and sound thing over here in the carriage house next week (it's a great performance space ... I feel like I'm living in a theatre). I've also offered to do an information session on starting a community radio station because this is the perfect place to have one. And I just got an email from a friend in Halifax asking if I can come down to help him for a couple of days on his documentary. So I'm even getting some paid work ...
It's feeling really good. This afternoon I'm going to go pick some flowers .. the lilacs are still in bloom and there are lupins everywhere.
I am getting so many ideas for new things to do. That's all for now .. I wrote something longer yesterday but for some reason the computer lost it. So I'm going to keep it short.
Still working on how to upload pictures from my camera. I have a lot of good ones so I will work on it.
The dogs just came in ... they sure get my attention. In the next couple of days I'll devote a whole chapter to Ursula, Seamus and Bronx. They're quite a team .. big enough between the three of them to pull a dog sled.
Hey, how about adding some comments, folks! That's what these blog things are for. I feel like I'm talking to myself here. All you have to do is click on the word "comment" on the bottom and a screen pops right up. Easy.
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
I'm here
So good to feel ground under my feet that isn't moving. I'm now in Bear River and it is just as magical as I remember it. Went for a walk with Ursula as a light rain was falling. It is green, green, green here, the lilacs are at their peak and there are also rhododendrons (one of my favourite plants).
The silence was so deep last night I could almost feel it on my skin. Ever had that feeling before?
The trip was pleasant and uneventful .. no flat tires, moose on the highway or speeding tickets. We went as far as Gananoque the first night where we spent the night at my friend Deb's place. It was hot so we pitched the tent in the backyard. And also went swimming in the St. Lawrence which was really a good idea on a hot summer evening.
Next day we were going to go as far as Quebec City but it was raining so we kept on going until the rain cleared. Had a cool but rainless night camping at Riviere du Loupe. It was a bit surreal -- our campground was down by the ferry dock and right across from "Chateau de Noel", a bit Christmas castle with towers and turrets lit up on into the night. And there was this motel that could only have been created in Quebec -- the Motel Loupi, name proclaimed in six foot high letters on the roof line. "Loupi"s picture was also on all the signs -- he looked more like a bear than a loup (wolf). I want to stay there someday just because it is just so ... out there. And also because Riviere du Loup is just down from the place where the St. Lawrence meets the Sageunay River ... the point where fresh water meets salt water. Lots of whale watching, tide pools, star fish and a really neat ecosystem.
The rest of the trip was long .. went all the way from Riviere du Loup (Quebec) through New Brunswick and all the way to Tremont Nova Scotia which is where my sister was going. Got in at 11 pm, I slept in Tony's (Cyndy's boyfriend) camper van and on the road to Bear River which was only an hour up the road.
Made a wonderful seafood chowder last night which I shared with my neighbour Robin, then made a really early night of it. Today I'm still getting settled in and am still in total amazement that I am going to be here in this wonderful place for three whole weeks.
More later. I need a bath -- my bathtub is a big old clawfoot next to a window looking out over the trees. I am being so well taken care of.
more later
Love
Victoria
The silence was so deep last night I could almost feel it on my skin. Ever had that feeling before?
The trip was pleasant and uneventful .. no flat tires, moose on the highway or speeding tickets. We went as far as Gananoque the first night where we spent the night at my friend Deb's place. It was hot so we pitched the tent in the backyard. And also went swimming in the St. Lawrence which was really a good idea on a hot summer evening.
Next day we were going to go as far as Quebec City but it was raining so we kept on going until the rain cleared. Had a cool but rainless night camping at Riviere du Loupe. It was a bit surreal -- our campground was down by the ferry dock and right across from "Chateau de Noel", a bit Christmas castle with towers and turrets lit up on into the night. And there was this motel that could only have been created in Quebec -- the Motel Loupi, name proclaimed in six foot high letters on the roof line. "Loupi"s picture was also on all the signs -- he looked more like a bear than a loup (wolf). I want to stay there someday just because it is just so ... out there. And also because Riviere du Loup is just down from the place where the St. Lawrence meets the Sageunay River ... the point where fresh water meets salt water. Lots of whale watching, tide pools, star fish and a really neat ecosystem.
The rest of the trip was long .. went all the way from Riviere du Loup (Quebec) through New Brunswick and all the way to Tremont Nova Scotia which is where my sister was going. Got in at 11 pm, I slept in Tony's (Cyndy's boyfriend) camper van and on the road to Bear River which was only an hour up the road.
Made a wonderful seafood chowder last night which I shared with my neighbour Robin, then made a really early night of it. Today I'm still getting settled in and am still in total amazement that I am going to be here in this wonderful place for three whole weeks.
More later. I need a bath -- my bathtub is a big old clawfoot next to a window looking out over the trees. I am being so well taken care of.
more later
Love
Victoria
Saturday, June 11, 2005
We're going .. really
I thought it might be a bit optimistic to plan to leave at 8 am. Especially after my buddy Andy showed up with many bottles of wine to be consumed.
But we are almost ready. We were planning to go as far as Montreal tonight and then my mother called and said it's Grand Prix weekend. Forget trying to find a campsite, hotel room or even a patch of gravel to park on for the night. So instead we are camping in my friend Deb's backyard in Gananoque. Which is beautiful -- we'll get there in time for supper and a swim and by any luck will make it to Quebec City tomorrow.
You might not hear from me for a few days unless I find some small Quebec town with an internet cafe. Or a campground with wireless Internet (this is a very strange concept, isn't it?)
Must go.
As I pack, a song I wrote a long time ago is going through my head:
"They say the mountains cry out to you
The wild winds all shout to you
The forests, they won't let you go.
The whole world's your home
God knows where you're roamin'
When you're wearing your travelling shoes"
- V. Fenner c. 1982 (believe it or not!)
But we are almost ready. We were planning to go as far as Montreal tonight and then my mother called and said it's Grand Prix weekend. Forget trying to find a campsite, hotel room or even a patch of gravel to park on for the night. So instead we are camping in my friend Deb's backyard in Gananoque. Which is beautiful -- we'll get there in time for supper and a swim and by any luck will make it to Quebec City tomorrow.
You might not hear from me for a few days unless I find some small Quebec town with an internet cafe. Or a campground with wireless Internet (this is a very strange concept, isn't it?)
Must go.
As I pack, a song I wrote a long time ago is going through my head:
"They say the mountains cry out to you
The wild winds all shout to you
The forests, they won't let you go.
The whole world's your home
God knows where you're roamin'
When you're wearing your travelling shoes"
- V. Fenner c. 1982 (believe it or not!)
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
VF's Top Ten
I haven't even begun to think about what clothes to bring. The car needs to be cleaned out. I don't even have a To-Do list yet. But I have got my CDs all picked out. Most important things first, ya know.
My CD case will hold about 35, but to simplify matters I thought I would post just my absolute favourites so you know what I'm singin' and hummin' on down the road.
The list, in no order of preference:
1. Watershed - Grievous Angels - great songs about people heading off across the country, mostly in search of work "I'm startin' over at 30 like I did at 25". "And you just don't know, you just don't know, you just don't know how bad I want to go home". One of my favourite bands, the Grievous Angels' driving force is Charlie Angus, now a MP for somewhere up north (way north of the tourist line) and a strong advocate for environmental and human rights. Looks real unnatural in a tie though.
2. Dixie Chicks - Wide Open Spaces - 'cause the name says it all.
3. Joan Osborne - Righteous Love - I don't know a lot about Joan Osborne but she had a major role in the wonderful documentary, Standing in the Shadows of Motown. Having grown up across the river from Motor/Murder City, a good fix of the motown sound is always a great idea.
4. Glenn Gould - The Goldberg Variations - an avowed atheist friend of mine once said that the music of Bach is the only convincing argument he's heard for the existence of God. If you play this while looking at a snowy mountain peak or the ocean as the tide is coming in, you'll find a few more arguments. Truly sublime.
5. Rick Reimer - The Killaloe Rastaman - this CD is about finding heaven another way. Before I got this CD, I'd only heard Rick sing around the campfire late at the end of a long night of partying. So when I heard he put out a CD, I was skeptical. It's great, lots of fun and you just can't be sad when you listen to it. Good music and very political -- Rick is a lawyer who is a leader in the fight for the decriminalization of the venerable weed who lives in a place that is like nowhere else on earth.
6. Leonard Cohen - The Future - because his lyrics are divine. And his voice so unique. You don't get much better than "Closing Time" and "Democracy" in terms of evocative poetry.
7. Diana Krall - The Girl in the Other Room - Beautiful, sensitive, silky, poignant, lyrical and she's from Nanaimo. For quiet nights watching the tide go out and looking at the sun going down (and a bottle of wine if you're stopped for the night).
8. Saffire - The Uppity Blues Women - Live and Uppity - raunchy, insensitive and brutally honest. And did I mention a hell of a lot of fun. The UPW are a group of women in their forties, fifties and sixties who can really growl out a tune. With titles like "Bitch with a Bad Attitude", "Silver Beaver" (yes, it is about what you think it's about ..) and a little number where the chorus goes "I need a young, young man to chase away my middle aged blues.
9. The Best of Emerson Lake and Palmer - Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends. I used to love those '70's art rock bands. Then I grew up and realized Rick Wakeman was kinda tacky. But Jethro Tull still rocks (Aqualung should be on this list too but I'm running out of top ten spots). And ELP still really holds up. Even if they forgot to put Benny the Bouncer on the collection. Karn Evil 9 is there, so that almost makes up for it.
10. Parliament's Greatest Hits - heavy funk, wonderful for rush hour traffic where you're not going very far very fast -- you can put the car in neutral and groove with every part of the body that isn't needed to keep the car inching ahead. Or just dancing on the beach with headphones on. And political "They call it the White House, but that's just a temporary condition .."
So guess I'd better go think about packing all the other necessities of life. Airing out the tent. Figuring out what I need for food. And books. Got any recommendations before I hit the road?
My CD case will hold about 35, but to simplify matters I thought I would post just my absolute favourites so you know what I'm singin' and hummin' on down the road.
The list, in no order of preference:
1. Watershed - Grievous Angels - great songs about people heading off across the country, mostly in search of work "I'm startin' over at 30 like I did at 25". "And you just don't know, you just don't know, you just don't know how bad I want to go home". One of my favourite bands, the Grievous Angels' driving force is Charlie Angus, now a MP for somewhere up north (way north of the tourist line) and a strong advocate for environmental and human rights. Looks real unnatural in a tie though.
2. Dixie Chicks - Wide Open Spaces - 'cause the name says it all.
3. Joan Osborne - Righteous Love - I don't know a lot about Joan Osborne but she had a major role in the wonderful documentary, Standing in the Shadows of Motown. Having grown up across the river from Motor/Murder City, a good fix of the motown sound is always a great idea.
4. Glenn Gould - The Goldberg Variations - an avowed atheist friend of mine once said that the music of Bach is the only convincing argument he's heard for the existence of God. If you play this while looking at a snowy mountain peak or the ocean as the tide is coming in, you'll find a few more arguments. Truly sublime.
5. Rick Reimer - The Killaloe Rastaman - this CD is about finding heaven another way. Before I got this CD, I'd only heard Rick sing around the campfire late at the end of a long night of partying. So when I heard he put out a CD, I was skeptical. It's great, lots of fun and you just can't be sad when you listen to it. Good music and very political -- Rick is a lawyer who is a leader in the fight for the decriminalization of the venerable weed who lives in a place that is like nowhere else on earth.
6. Leonard Cohen - The Future - because his lyrics are divine. And his voice so unique. You don't get much better than "Closing Time" and "Democracy" in terms of evocative poetry.
7. Diana Krall - The Girl in the Other Room - Beautiful, sensitive, silky, poignant, lyrical and she's from Nanaimo. For quiet nights watching the tide go out and looking at the sun going down (and a bottle of wine if you're stopped for the night).
8. Saffire - The Uppity Blues Women - Live and Uppity - raunchy, insensitive and brutally honest. And did I mention a hell of a lot of fun. The UPW are a group of women in their forties, fifties and sixties who can really growl out a tune. With titles like "Bitch with a Bad Attitude", "Silver Beaver" (yes, it is about what you think it's about ..) and a little number where the chorus goes "I need a young, young man to chase away my middle aged blues.
9. The Best of Emerson Lake and Palmer - Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends. I used to love those '70's art rock bands. Then I grew up and realized Rick Wakeman was kinda tacky. But Jethro Tull still rocks (Aqualung should be on this list too but I'm running out of top ten spots). And ELP still really holds up. Even if they forgot to put Benny the Bouncer on the collection. Karn Evil 9 is there, so that almost makes up for it.
10. Parliament's Greatest Hits - heavy funk, wonderful for rush hour traffic where you're not going very far very fast -- you can put the car in neutral and groove with every part of the body that isn't needed to keep the car inching ahead. Or just dancing on the beach with headphones on. And political "They call it the White House, but that's just a temporary condition .."
So guess I'd better go think about packing all the other necessities of life. Airing out the tent. Figuring out what I need for food. And books. Got any recommendations before I hit the road?
Monday, June 06, 2005
Movin' on down the road
Hey friends. I really am heading toward Central Blissville. Central Blissville is a tiny town in New Brunswick that a friend of mine told me about. It's just a little ways from St. John and is a collection of a few houses.
I will try to go there just so I can take a picture. I am heading further than that .. to a small village called Bear River. It's on a tidal river near Digby, Nova Scotia -- a dramatic little place where the river empties 30 feet of water twice a day. I'm going to this particular place because my wonderful friends Simone and Tim have offered me the use of a one bedroom studio for a month.
And it has a piano.
During my time away, I'm going play piano lots (WITHOUT sheet music in front of me so I can learn to improvise .. something I've always wanted to do better). I have a couple of audio pieces that I am working on, writing I want to do. And I also hope to learn more about film/video documentaries from my friend Tim Wilson who is a very talented producer of both radio and TV.
And I'm going to do a whole bunch of wandering around, breathe the clean salt air deeply, make lots of seafood chowder (because Digby is, after all, the the world capital of the inshore scallop fleet). But first, I am going to have a long, leisurely drive with my sister Cyndy, camping at places along the way and just taking our time and enjoying being on the road.
I'll be posting pictures (once I learn how to do it!) so you'll be able to see what I am up to. Please post comments and say hi to me along the way -- Bear River has a public internet site so there will be no shortage of wires to link me with my friends.
I'm leaving Saturday morning, so wish me bon voyage and blow me a kiss goodbye.
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